i can’t be alone after a relationship
i’m freshly out of a relationship and i realized that the thought of being alone scares me. i hate to admit it but attention is something i crave and when i have a partner it feels like well i have all their attention. when things get bad and we go our separate ways, i struggle to move on and i can’t seem to understand that my happiness doesn’t revolve around someone else. i have this idea that my partner is mine forever and i can’t help but feel sick when my partner moves on and thats why i find it hard to move on. i feel very possessive and angry towards my past partner and i dont know why. any advice on learning to love yourself after a relationship? i just feel like i cant stand to imagine my partner happy with someone else.
@enieves
https://youtu.be/KsH63qJlIMM?si=kyaQa9xRKEtlOtTb
You are currently going through a very tough time. Breakups can cause voids in your life. At this point you should focus on yourself and reflection. Hobbies and chores are a great way to distract the emptiness you feel inside. Talking these feelings of being alone with your friends and people online is a great way to avoid feeling completely alone.
We support you here! Sending good vibes to you..😇🫶.
@enieves I am not sure about your past but if ever you were holding
on something bad from your past, you must learn to forgive someone from
your past and I am not
sure who that was. Were you from a family that abused you? You must free
yourself from anger, bitterness, unforgiveness, resentment and any
heaviness in your heart you must cast them away in Jesus' Name.
I
also am not sure what really happened that made you crave attention,
but if I were to share, some people crave attention because when they
were younger, they experienced abuse or neglect or something so much was
given towards them but the parents never taught them or learned
themselves how to emotionally regulate. Then they grew up adults not
knowing how to emotionally regulate which causes friction to their
relationships like wanting unreasonable attention, treating people like
objects like they think they can control and possess them.
I am not sure if this resonates with you, but you know controlling someone or possessing someone is not an act of love, it is a more of a selfish desire that you must free yourself from. We all have free will, and that free will is made to prove love. If God did not create free will then we are made to become robots and to be controlled how He wanted it to be, but we all have free will that we have our own decisions and that by loving others glorifies Him for He is love.
I completely feel the same, i think that this is coming from lack of self love and depending on someone to give this to you.
I am very selfaware about my feelings and thoughts, but never really learned how to regulate them.
It's hard realising that we face an unknown period of time alone again. But as long as you don't learn to coop with that, we are never really gonna make any relationship last..
They can feel the pressure of affirmation, how small it may be. We need to learn how to love ourself completly first, so an external love can be an addition, not a dependency.
I am also struggling atm with accepting this and learning how to move forward, but talking about it is already good step forward.
It will be okay, maybe not today, or tomorrow, or even next week and month, but we will get there.🍀