mindset while breaking up

Hey there. As you may saw, this is more like a general topic of a realtionship-breakup, but still I want to share my thoughts and discuss about it.

My girlfriend and I are now together since about 4y. We got a lot of great moments, wonderful time, many adventures. But also we're both the type of partner, that gets set up quickly. So we had a lot of nonsense-discussions in the last month. Every time we had one of those we talked it out afterwards. But since I wanted to give her a respectful discussion with controlling my expressions and being a thinkful interlocutor things were getting stranger each time. I also mentioned a relationship-coaching to get clearance how i can improve myself while talking to her and responding to her feelings.

yesterday we had one more of those nonsense-discussions. Afterwards I now can regret, that she left our home and we wrote about it. I argued a bit to give her an insight to my thoughts and excused myself for this dumb behaviour. So she came home at night and cried in bed alone, which i didn't noticed (honestly). After I came into the bedroom she told me to leave me, because I'm not able to take care of her feelings. We talked about it and she sayed it's not my fault, it's hers and i cannot do anything about it, because I'm not the type of emotional-sensitive guy who notices her feelings. To be honest, she is right, I am a objective person.

But the fact that she layed in bed and cried for hours made me so angry about myself and disappointed about my own behaviour, that I now want her to never feel the same again. I also can't imagine the opportunity that she will get into an *** after leaving me. In my sight, I'm not wrong in trying to keep her and fighting for her feelings.

Can anyone tell me if this is just me overthinking or is it really sort of aggressive stereotypical thinking to fight now? I'm lost in this situation and don't know how to respond to her... i also wrote her a letter before explaining the exact same situation...