How to Let Go of Someone You Love
I'm new in this kind of situation.
He's my first love... and my first heartbreak too.
I hate feeling this way. I want to let go but I don't want to forget about him. Apart from being someone I love, he was also my friend.
I feel being so dramatic, dumb and stupid right now. At first, we have the same feelings for each other, but then later on he changed. He just cut me off all of a sudden. I trusted him. I never thought it would be easy for him to do this to me. I am hurt, scared and ashamed of myself, and its stings through my chest. I sound too emotional yes, but I don't know the right words to explain how I feel. I never thought it would be this painful.
How do I let go of the idea that he'll eventually comeback to me? Because the more I am hopeful, the more I am hurt.
I know all of this might sound so cliche, but I don't know what do. Yes, I need to move on. But, how?
I am so lost.
@mystiq
As someone who has lost a husband in much the same way, I feel for you.
There is no easy answer to your question. everyone grieves differently for different periods of time so do not put a time limit on when to heal, it has been a year for me and still I sometimes hope he will hit his head and suddenly see how foolish he was, but he has not come back, he seems happier than ever without me at his side, and the times I really think about it, it hurts.
Focus on yourself for now.
Do everything in your power to not think of him. get really into one or two hobbies you have and keep busy. write down negative thoughts in a journal and learn to identify what causes them, and take action against them. for example, if you feel ugly, you may find yourself getting emotional when it comes to self care and not really wanting to dress nice anymore and complaining about unruly hair or wishing you had bigger hips, so you wear something different, get a few close friends together and get hair and nails done together. You still matter even if no one else feels that way. You are still important even if others do not acknowledge you.
If you are able, "date" yourself.
Go the movies, buy yourself flowers, write yourself love letters and mail them to yourself. Strange I know, and it won't be easy or comfortable at first, but the long term rewards are worth it. bonus points if you try something crazy and new and learn something new about yourself. being alone is not the same as being lonely, if you find that dating yourself is too hard, have a girls night out. talk to a few people you trust about the situation.
DO NOT ISOLATE YOURSELF.
I did this and all I got for it was depression and severe anxiety. I am still trying to undo all the damage I did to myself. if it all feels like too much to handle, seriously send an SOS to every loved one you can think of and to every friend you think you have. Do not go it alone if you feel overwhelmed. do not bash yourself for crying, it will happen often, let it happen, keep the tissues close. it will get better. He might come back or he might not, it is not wrong to hope, just don't let it control you. I hope I helped.