Inability to talk
I find my self with a hell of alot to say but am unable to really do so. i write notes to myself as a way of venting but a note cant help me with my problems, and when my wife found the notes, i found i couldnt comunicate my feelings verbaly. i tryed the live chat here and was unable to write a single thing, i've tryed seeing a Dr and i cant get my problems out. I feel as if i cant say whats wrong because by doing so i will hurt someone and i strongly believe that my actions shouldnt cause anyone harm... But as the famous tram conundrum my inaction is hurting someone still. i find my self depressed and praying for it all to end. i know my problem but i cant do anything about it, and i cant say anything about it. i'm just stuck here in purgatory.
@RatBoyGuitar I have a very difficult time talking out loud as well, and I usually end up writing things instead...what I found that worked for me was using writing to talk to my counselor. At uni there was free counselling, so I wrote down the things I wanted to say and gave it to her to read, so that I didn't have to say anything. She would speak and I had the option to speak or to write a response to her. She even encouraged me to write out my thoughts after, since usually I would want to say something but be too scared to in the moment, so we reviewed my after-thoughts in the next session. So, I guess that is an option if you would like, to try going to the doctor with a written note. You could even try explaining your difficulty with talking right in the note/letter, if you wanted. It's a tough situation but I don't think you should feel bad about it, this isn't your fault and you deserve understanding and patience 
@RatBoyGuitar Hey how are you? I just read your post and it is a good thing you are on this site and you are looking to better yourself. I myself find it hard at times to adress what I feel like I need to, sometimes it just seems like a rant. If you have to rant to let it out rant all you need. Please do not keep anything bottled up like you wrote in your post about writting notes to express yourself, keep it up. My good friend Damon once told me to do this as well and he himself does it if he can't seem to adress himself, he also gives notes to his doctor if he can't adress his issues. Please remember that tommorow is another day, there's always tommorow. And about not knowing how to express yourself well guess what my friend...you explained yourself well. You are on the right path sending you good vibes and hope you find what you are looking for in this life we live. Take Care, Melanie.
