Letting go
Good Morning
I'm a smart cookie. Least I like to think so. But herein lies my problem. I'm having a hard time letting go of someone who rejected me. Make sense? No, it doesn't. Not even to me. He lied, cheated, hurt me badly but yet I can't let go. Is it something from my childhood or is it me? Any and all thoughts, advice or opinions are more than welcome. Thank you :)
@Purplelilac
Doesn't make sense to me either, but I'm in the same boat!
Maybe it's the eternal optimist in us....we can kid ourselves things are bound to work out. Maybe it's the fear of what if, in the event we actually do something in our self interest for once. Maybe it's the sense of not trusting ourselves, and the fear of doing or saying something we'll later regret. Or as you say, it could all stem back to childhood - that desire to be loved, that craving to be good enough, that hope that one day, all will be well.
But you know yourself, hanging on to someone who treats you badly, and who doesn't value you, damages you more than the consequences of letting them go. It's not an easy instinct to trust. But you deserve to believe in yourself, and to want better.
@BestIcanbe
You are so right and my head knows that. As cliche as it sounds I think it does stem from childhood. I was rejected by both my mother and father. And as I got older by my mother all the time. My stepdad was amazing but not her. I fell unconditionally in love with this man. He cheated on me after four years together,lied and so much more. We remained close after working out our hurts but he literally drains me. I'm an empath. He is a narcissist. Not a great combination romantically.
@Purplelilac
Did you read the blog below? It relates to your situation, though it doesn't tell you how to resolve it. I guess that's for you to figure out. But at least you know you're not alone.
https://www.7cups.com/blog/post/109/How+Our+Past+Informs+Our+Relationships.html
