Just referred myself for professional help - also new here...
I've told myself, this is the last time! I have been 'dealing' with what I can only describe as stress since around 2009. Often my stress manifests itself as anger and I honestly believe it is getting worse.
The other night I flipped at my partner because of a comment they made about a job they wished for me to do which felt like a nag because I knew it was a job that needed doing but I just hadn't had to time to get to it yet.
Let me first start my saying I have never and will never physically hurt anybody - except myself (although that's a problem in itself). Also let me clarify that I absolutely love life (well... parts of it) so thoughts of significant harm to myself although occasionally pop into my head are quickly squashed by my sheer appreciation of life (since life is way to short and it'll be over soon anyway).
Anyhow, back to the stress and anger issue - At points I just feel my mind boil over and no sooner than that's happened I'll often clench my fist and punch a wall, punch myself, break stuff (if that has appeared to me as being the object that has made me reach breaking point) and of course, I know it's stupid - It bugs the hell out of me when someone tells me that it's a stupid thing to do or tells me that it was a silly thing to get angry over - no **** - of course that to me is like a rag to a bull and I will shout at them and feel my rage even more and will end up hitting myself or a wall or breaking something else.
Anyhow - I am seeking professional help because I hate myself when I am like that and I need help to learn to deal with this myself - it's not that I don't know how, it's not that I am not willing to try it's just that I think having someone impartial that I can openly speak my mind to and of course to receive completely impartial advice not to mention someone else who will be able to help me keep track of my own progress.
I've also signed up her to 7 cups of tea because whilst I wait for my assessment I'm hoping I can get started on trying to discover more about what's making me so stressed and coping with it better. Just one more way to track my progress.
Thanks,
PonderingPrimate
Good to see that you have taken a step towards professional help. I am also new here, have been dealing with a boat load of problems such as depression, anxiety, separation anxiety, feeling like no one cares, it's time to take control. Currently calling around to my doctor and getting recommendations. It makes me nervous having to need professional help, but that is what this site is for (at least what I have seen of it so far) I am the same was as I love life and wouldn't ever do anything to harm myself or others but the thought is always there. I am working on getting a second job as well so I can afford to get out of the toxic environment that is my parents house (moved out and had to move back in because of finances) But nonetheless we are happy to have you here at 7cups :) it gets better.
@TherapyCatLover Hi :) Nice to meet you. Sorry for the late reply, I feel like I am always so busy. I really appreciate your reply. Best of luck also with your adventure to mental wellness.
Yeah, I moved out of my parents 2 years ago and for me that was great to be able to stop clashing with them! I know what you mean.
Best of luck with your second job, hope everything works out for you :)