Why??
I'm just tired, I guess. Tired of being the one that holds everything together. Tired of being the one that's right for the job. Tired of living someone else's life. Is it wrong that I want to focus on myself. Why do I always have to fix their mistakes? Why do I have to be their parents, why they can't they be mine? I don't ask for my parents love. I don't ask for their affection or even their attention. I don't ask you help. I'm not asking you to care about me. All I am asking is that you do your job, not for me but for my siblings. You decided to have kids, so why am I forced to be their parent? No more false promises of change. No more lies. No more excuses. You know what you're doing is wrong, you've told me it's wrong
@JollyRacher I'm truly sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. It's an immense burden to carry the responsibilities you've described, especially when you long for a change in the dynamics of your family. It's clear that you've shouldered a heavy load, and your desire to focus on yourself and have a different role in your family is entirely valid.
Your feelings of exhaustion and frustration are understandable, and it's important to acknowledge the toll this situation is taking on your mental and emotional well-being. It's concerning to hear about the thoughts of having a knife as a form of escape. Please consider reaching out to a mental health professional or a crisis hotline to share your feelings and seek support.
You deserve to have a life that is not defined solely by the responsibilities you've been carrying. If it feels overwhelming, consider exploring avenues that might provide you with the support and assistance you need. Your well-being matters, and there are people who want to help. Take care.
