The Gift of Empathy
Hey all,
So I feel like empathy is something that I have always taken for granted in the context of my personality.
Ever since I can really remember, I've nearly always had the ability to practically *feel* what someone else is feeling. I cultivated this skill subconsciously to survive a traumatic childhood, and it's been...interesting to have spent a lot of my life as something of an emotional tuning fork of sorts.
And there's definitely the double-edged nature of all this. Meaning, that while I can easily internalize and share the feelings of another, I very much at the same time have to keep watch over myself that I don't end up becoming too emotionally drained from the interaction.
All this being said though, I believe that empathy, in itself, is a gift. I have to imagine that one of the reasons that I have been able to cultivate the connections that I have in my life is because of this ability to feel and relate with others.
And since human beings are social creatures, I find myself increasingly grateful for both who I am and the people that I have the pleasure of sharing time with. While I can't say that I wholly appreciate all of the reasons that made me empathic, I am becoming more at peace with who I am--no matter what.
So yeah, I guess a question for you all in all of this would be:
How has being on the giving or receiving end of empathy helped you (and/or others) in your lives?
Great post @sereneSunset26!
Personally I found that empathy has really given me control over my frustration and anger when I do find myself in those moments. Understanding the other person who I may be angry at really gives me understanding of their perspective and what influenced them to do something that I may not have liked. From this I get a lot more understanding and willing to forgive/repair.
@sunnyWriting4806
Personally I found that empathy has really given me control over my frustration and anger when I do find myself in those moments. Understanding the other person who I may be angry at really gives me understanding of their perspective and what influenced them to do something that I may not have liked. From this I get a lot more understanding and willing to forgive/repair.
That is really good point; being able (and more so, willing) to put ourselves in another's shoes/feelings is a quick and effective way for us to be able to decompress and de-escalate from certain emotions such as frustration and anger.
Hello. Wow. I’ve been in a dark place and decided to try out this app… your “The Gift of Empathy” post was the first thing I saw when I opened my app. I think it’d be a crime to not stop and thank you. I didn’t know how badly I needed to hear that.
I’ve always been the most empathetic person I know. You worded it better than I ever could, you said “Ever since I can really remember, I’ve nearly always had the ability to practically *feel* what someone else is feeling”… reading that felt like a million pounds lifted off my back because for the first time ever, I felt like someone really understood me.
I can’t wear under eye makeup because it’s almost inevitable that I’ll cry everyday. Not because of anything I’m feeling and it’s not always a sad cry, or even a long cry. I just always find myself in tears experiencing the emotions of others.
It doesn’t even have to be people I know and talk to…. Give me a golden buzzer on an episode of “America’s Got Talent” and I’m crying because I’m so genuinely excited for that person in that moment. It’s almost like my brain is saying “yes. That person is getting their moment. That person deserves this and deserves every second of happiness they are getting right now”.
Until I read your post, I felt like being empathetic was such a burden in my life. Like I was experiencing people’s emotions more than they even were. More than anything, I felt like I was the only person in this world who experienced empathy so strongly.
I don’t know if I believe in god. But I do believe someone somewhere out there put this post of yours in my life at this moment. Thank you, for not only giving me a new perspective on my life, but for taking a weight off my shoulders I didn’t realize I was carrying. I’m lucky to be empathetic <3 not everyone gets that gift.
@MatrixMind
Wow...umm...I really don't know what to say besides "thank you" and I'm just extremely humbled. Perhaps more so than by just about anything else anyone has ever said or written to me.
I do know that it can feel very isolating (and lonely) to feel what you described so eloquently - that feeling of feeling like we might be alone with/in our particular feelings or dispositions.
But, like you realized, we're not, and you're not. :)
And something else I probably should have included in my post would be this. In addition to the tuning fork analogy, I've always felt things on a deep level. Not so much to tears (in my case), but just waaaaay down deep in wherever my soul resides.
So basically this means, when I'm feeling content/happiness/joy, I really get to experience the full spectrum of those emotions. And conversely, if I'm feeling sadness/frustration/grief, I also get to feel the full experience.
And I know there have been times where I have borderline resented or just wanted to turn down the knob on my personality that way. But, I feel like if I did (or could do) that, then I wouldn't be me. And I couldn't have that. :)