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Out of everyone I know, I appreciate my dad the most.. this is why. (copied and pasted from another thread I made)

in school, when I had to write an essay based off of whatever paragraph that told me what to write, my mind would go nuts.

That's how bad my father got me scared. My emotions got to the best of me.

every day, I walk and i fear humans, because of him.

What he did was, took what I owned away from me, destroyed them bit by bit, left me looking like a homeless stranger, sent me back to California from Hawaii because he was living there, and in the process, verbally abused me to the point of me thinking he was sheer hate, all for something I said on Facebook about why can't I get a virtual game card, and my stepbrother can, when dad said it is not wise, for me.

I was 14 at the time.. I didn't know what my dad meant when he said F**K you Ben, to me.

I went to the airport driving with him, and looked back at my dad for the last time when he sped off.

I had to walk to the gate alone, heck, I had run to it.

As I went home.. I figured, there really is nothing left for me. IE, no games left to play, as I was a huge nerd.

One year passed. I got a surprise call from my dad I was prescribed meds for my depression and suicidal thoughts, so I didn't know the reason why he did.

He said to me, sorry.

I was shocked, as I needed time to forgive him. To hear that he had biploar depression and pancreatitis was alarming. I had a gut feeling something was going to happen.

Months later, on September 4, 2014, he passed from a massive heart attack.

Dad, you went through so much.

I cannot imagine what you went through when you said to me, "Friends will always let you down".

I always think things are stupid. Dad, when you said that movie quote, "Stupid is is stupid does", I now realize you gotta accept the way things are and move on.

I remember the time I insulted you when I was a child, dad. I put you in a coma for 2 days.

I know your pain, as I remember seeing your xanax on the counter of your bedroom. You took that, as prescribed, for your temper.

You believed in me, regardless of the circumstance we faced, that I could find love.

I remember seeing the sticker on your door after the funeral, that simply stated "Stay strong". It made me think, that whenever you went outside, you faced challenges daily, and you needed a reminder.

Dad, i know you abandoned me when I was an infant, and you went to jail for it, but you have promised to forgive yourself and move on from such a thing.

If it wasn't for my birth, dad, you would have had to fight in the 9/11 fires, as you graduated fire academy and quit right after.

Most importantly, you, out of all things, you told me that I made you feel joy.

Dad.. I know you made me fear human, but I will never forget these things, and the times I had with you.

I want to say this to you, and endless things as well to you:

not all that glitters is gold.

that idiom is the best Ive faced so far.

because when you see something it looks heavenly, but when you find out the meaning behind their way towards how they looked that way… it gives someone motivation

it gives someone a will to want that face.. that indescribable beauty that lies in front of the madness

I feel this way with you dad.. daily

I want to have my own face like he had your greatest loving face.. because you went through so much to get where you are now

you went through so much to get to.. the spirit world

and Ill go through so much to get to.. tomorrow

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Would like to say thank-you to @invaderstitch and @eccho for everything they have done in respective communities!!! Your work is very valued and apprecciated!!!