I miss you Mya

I miss my cat Mya so much. I know she is at peace now, but it hurts so bad living without her. She died from cancer a month ago but everyday I miss her more. I still remember every detail about her last day here on earth, we spent the whole day together I wanted to make it the best day for her but sadly I couldn’t, she was in pain and couldn’t even walk anymore, I remember seeing her walk for the last time, eat her favorite treat for the last time, and I remember our last hug and the last kiss I gave her. I thought I had one more day with her but she couldn’t wait until her appointment in the morning so we had to take her to the vet at 2 am to get euthanized, I will never forget how I saw her and the last time me and Mya listened to her favorite lullabies, and I will never forget the last time I saw my beautiful girl. I think of all the memories me and her had, it just makes me want to cry. She was always here for me, I’ve had her my whole life and she was with me through everything. She would always let me cry on her, she didn’t care if she got all wet from my tears, she never left me. I miss how she would run up to me when I got home every day and the way she looked at me with love. She loved to lay in the sun, that it what we did her last day, we laid in the sun through the kitchen window for the last time just me and her, she was in her favorite bed with all her favorite stuffed animals. I still remember our last night together me and her slept on my bedroom floor in her bed because she couldn’t jump on my bed anymore. I miss her purrs and the way she would snore so loud. I miss her so much, she was always here for me, she never ignored me or hurt me like people do. I knew I could always count on her to be here for me. She was my best friend, we spent every day together, I would cancel plans just to be with her. She was more than just a cat, she was family and my best friend. I still have all her favorite things in my room, her beds, her toys she played with when she was little, her stuffed animals, her blankets, her treats and even her last treat, she couldn’t finish, I still have it. She died a month before her 14th birthday, I wanted her to be here so bad for her birthday and my birthday 3 days before hers, but she couldn’t. She loved balloons, especially the string, she loved to bite it, so I had to get her a balloon for her birthday to tie on her box of ashes, I know she would have loved it. I have her ashes in her favorite bed in my room. It feels so weird without her here, it feels empty here. She is the reason I am still here because I knew she needed me and I didn’t want to leave her. It feels so weird not taking care of her anymore, through cancer I always took care of her, I changed her bandage twice a day, about a month before she died she was hardly eating, but I tried my best to get her to eat, I mixed her food with treats, I even fed her one bite at a time, poor Mya couldn’t move. I remember the last night we woke up together and I fed her, not knowing that it would be her last day and later that day she was struggling to breathe, it broke my heart to see her like that, I think of it all the time. It scared me to see her like that, it was the moment I dreaded for months and even years. She saw me grow up and I wouldn’t have wanted it to be any other cat, she was exactly what I needed and she knew exactly what I needed, if she saw me crying she would always come up to me and let me hug her and she wouldn’t leave until she knew everything was okay. It breaks my heart to know that I will never see her again here but I hope someday I will see her again, and I hope she will be pain free and young again. I miss her so deeply. Rest in peace Mya, I love you so much 🤍🪽🐈