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Sunisshiningandsoareyou profile picture
Shared Experiences!♡
by Sunisshiningandsoareyou
Last post
 October 16th
...See more Hey hey, everyone coming across this post. I hope you're doing well. 💛 Grief and loss, is something I feel most of us have experienced in different forms, with varied intensity of emotions, thoughts and emotional reactions to it. As earth-shatteringly difficult it is to experience loss of some kind and do not even get me started on loss of a love one hehe (oh but I definitely will come here too💛), or cope with it, I feel something that remotely, I say remotely because I'm not much of the opinion that anything ever truly helps or fills the void in your life and the hole in your heart! (Much love to you if you feel the same and Kudos to you if you found something that helped you in any way💛). Again, I feel something that *remotely* helps is that we aren't alone in our experiences! It's not like "seeing someone else in pain makes you feel better about yours", more like "seeing someone feel what you do, say what you cannot and understand what you find incomprehensible somewhere, somehow, in whatever small quantity possible too, makes you feel *seen*, makes your pain feel seen, reminds you that what you experienced is 'worthy' of a reaction from you, also helps you understand your feelings better, because sometimes you're not even sure what to really call that 'sudden feeling of a big lump forming in your throat when you're sitting around people giggling and doing their thing' when everything feels 'okay' around you". (Apologies for getting carried away haha, I'm not proof-reading this one, and it's just something straight from my heart, hopefully to yours, typos included😅) Anyway, circling back again, what I find remotely helpful is the idea of shared experiences, of people connected in their grief! Which is why I love reflecting on how someone perceives loss and grief for them, hearing what they have to say about it too! Sometimes it's these shared experiences, heart felt words and raw emotions that remind me I'm not alone, and a lot of times, this is comforting to know! Going forward, I'd like to share some quotes I find comforting with the hope that anyone coming across them here can have a little "oh you see it too?" moment, knowing they aren't alone either and someone has had experienced something as they have and stood by to share it with the world also. The massive amount of courage it takes to talk about it, to relive all of it all over again, to be *brave* for comforting someone else! Most people may not even realise how inspiring they are! 💛 Please feel welcome to share any quotes you like that provide you comfort or reflect on any you see here also! 💛
tommy profile picture
Grief & Loss Automated Taglist!
by tommy
Last post
 July 22nd
...See more Welcome to the Grief & Loss Taglist This thread is an auto-updating list. The list is regularly updated by forum leaders and can be found below. Having issues? Reply below and someone will help you! Why should I join the taglist? ✔ Never miss out on sub-community check-ins, discussions or events ✔ Get tagged and notified by community leaders whenever a new relevant thread has been posted ✔ Become a more active member of the community. What do I need to do? ✅ To add yourself to this taglist, press the Post to Thread button below and write the exact words Please add me. ❌ To remove yourself from this taglist, press the Post to Thread button below and write the exact words Please remove me. ------------------------- Current taglist as of 9 September (updated by @tommy) @azuladragon34 @Char1984 @CordialBeing @GentleCalmness @HealingTalk @Jaeteuk @LeonardoMarino @mish3l @mytwistedsoul @Sunisshiningandsoareyou @tommy
ASilentObserver profile picture
Grief Support Session Resumes!
by ASilentObserver
Last post
 January 6th, 2025
...See more Hello all,  I want to inform everyone that we'll have a Grief Support Session starting this Saturday, 19th of October, at 8.00 pm ET time zone in the Support Session group chat. All are invited to join and participate to explore & discuss the experiences and emotions related to grief. @CaringEzra will lead the sessions. Listeners who are experiencing grief are also welcome to join and participate from their member accounts. We look forward to seeing you there! Note: If anyone like to host some support sessions, please do send me a pm at @ASilentObserver Any and all help will be much appreciated. tagging some of the friends: @Jaeteuk, @Happy2Help18, @reallyoverallofit @jonghyunnie, @BlueDarkAurora, @mytwistedsoul 
awsomeml profile picture
Life after Loss
by awsomeml
Last post
 3 hours ago
...See more I lost my mom 2 months ago. My father is very emotionally manipulative, everything he does comes at a cost. Today, I went to work after disagreeing with my coworkers, I walked into work and spent the entire day feeling alienated.  I have a migraine, haven’t ate and I’m finding I’m missing my mom more than ever so I’ve been crying for hours. 😮‍💨😪
scorpioNov profile picture
My mom is dying, my family stonewalled me. 💔
by scorpioNov
Last post
 24 hours ago
...See more I don’t even know how to put this pain into words anymore. My mother is dying of cancer, and I’ve been trying so hard to help her. I spent countless nights researching treatments, doctors, and clinical trials because I couldn’t bear the thought of losing her without trying. Now I feel completely shut out of her care by my own family. I’m heartbroken. I feel betrayed, helpless, and overwhelmed with grief. I know I didn’t handle every moment perfectly, when I found out about the group chats and conference meeting that my cousins were invited to but I was left out, I started to feel racing thoughts and high emotions and cussed everyone out! 😔😔😔 my mom said she didn’t want me left out but my sister blocked me from everything, yesterday was the worst birthday I’ve had…. I cried, because I’m just waiting for my mom to die.. I researched so many ways. I found her a cancer institute near me, and I offered her to come live with me in which she said that would be great. everything I did came from loving my mother and wanting to help her. I’m not looking for judgment or arguments. I just need someone to listen, because I’m hurting more than I know how to explain. 💔
indigoPapaya2280 profile picture
My nan ♥️
by indigoPapaya2280
Last post
 1 day ago
...See more My grandmother is 90 and she has cancer. She has had such a good life and she is at peace. I do still wish we had a few more years, but i guess i would yearn those years as much as if it wasn't the situation is was. She has little time left. She lives in another country because that is where my family are from. Every since we were born we came every year spent christmas here and some summers we came. I have the bestest of memories. I lost my grandad 7 o so years back also to cancer. I know they are old. The cancer is still annoying because maybe he woukd be here a bit longer. Maybe my grandma could stay a bit longer. I know I want just a bit longer because its coming to and end. Anyway my grandparents really kept christmas alive and we all used to go their flat. When my granddad passed away we still did that. But now that my grandmother will pass away her flat will be sold, all the christmas traditions we had were because of her and she wanted to carry on doing it. Its true we're getting older so maybe dancing and singing around the christmas tree and buying presents and putting the under the christmas tree and decorating a tree and a christmas game we played... were more when we were younger. Today we said goodbye to her at the hospice because we're flying back tomorrow. We have been visiting her there these days, it was hard to see her the way she was but I still kept my spirits alive, i was just happy to be with her, throughout I've been not really processing not on purpose a bit scared to. I have cried but not much. Anyway I kept looking at her today and other days with so much love. And she smiled when i went to give her a hug and it felt so innocent and sweet. And when I was saying buy her she said have a nice few days. ( we cant communicate too much because of language barriers) i thought she was going to say have a nice life that's how I took it, she softened it by what she said idk if on purpose or language barrier. That made me fill with cry. I think maybe im used to her saying have a nice day have a nice trip i guess that felt really deep, but its was the perfect thing she could say. She started to cry as well. Were so used to saying goodbye because we live far away but this time it was for good. I still think im going to see her soon somehow, i think i survive on these kind of thoughts in general in life. I realistically won't I know I won't but at heart shes not really going. I guess i mean in memory she will be here. Its just really sad. Its as positive as this situation can get, so a lot of my tears or thoughts have been thinking about all those years we have spent together, all the good memories and how lucky we have been and are happy-sad tears. My first tears with her felt so dense like heavy, my second tears from today felt im.not sure, i like to analyse all small details, i would also like to know what she was thinking when she also cried because uo to that point even with other crying she hadn't. I guess just having to say bye to us. We will still talk a bit more over videocalls. It's so weird, this situation has me Deeping life in general. Also how much life i still have and how I want to live it. I still need to process this all. The flat feels like it's replaying all the memories. It doesn't feel empty to me even if shes not here, maybe because she is still alive. But I also have to say bye to the flat. It feels like im reliving memories or imagining moments of when we were younger. And imagining theyre all here now. Its has been the best. I feel scared that we will separate or that we won't meet up much from now on. It does feel like we're saying bye a bit to our childhood. I feel like i have this dark cloud above me that only i could see but she could too, i always thiught that, from thibgs they transalated to me or how it felt. I was crying more like sobbing i couldnt stop a few years back on my own in the balcony and she cane to me and i always felt a connection since then. And i think when she said that today i thought how can i wothought, as simole as that or i thought i will try, or maybe i deserve to have a nice life idk i cant pinpoint it. I have been thinking thes days ive been here how hard it am on myself and re-read the past with less anger and in general feel less shame of who i am. And maybe she felt my tears were more than about her going. Im getting a bit of a headache. And I have a flight tomorrow. If u got up to here wow hahah that would be nice. Im glad for this space to unwind. Is this was grief does? Does it also make u think about ur life and other aspects? I feel I am lost in thoughts and nostalgia. Is it a sad happy feeling for others? Im not happy that she's going of course. Im happy that shes in peace that i get to think about all those happy moments. I love her and i loved my grandfather. ♥️
Merl2010 profile picture
Sorry Mum
by Merl2010
Last post
 Tuesday
...See more I recently lost my mum due to cancer and I didn't know how bad she was till it was to late as she didn't tell any one how bad she was But thinking back the sings were there and I should have taken more notice Is easy for me to say I didn't know or was it I just didn't want to think about what could be wrong Ever since I was a kid my mum didn't want me to away from home for long and I never moved out and I'm in my 40s now Since she retired I had to scale back my work to the point I hardly had any and found it hard to go out for more than a few hours I used to get do frustrated and argue about that and said rotten things to her as It felt like I couldn't get though We always made up and I never left on a harsh word How she was and other things that didn't make sense and I thought she was just being difficult But now knowing about her health makes total sense and I feel so guilty how I was to her at times If only she had said I'd have dropped everything without question
BerenTinuviel profile picture
3 Years Later…its still a hard week
by BerenTinuviel
Last post
 Tuesday
...See more 3 years ago this Friday, my younger brother died. He was 20. 20 years was longer than he should’ve made it. He was born with severe intestine and kidney problems which he shouldn’t have survived. He had more surgeries than I could ever count and multiple transplants. Then, just over 3 years ago and a month after my wedding, he was diagnosed with cancer. Aggressive. It only took three months. I don’t even remember what I did two years ago at this time. Almost definitely isolated, but it’s pretty much blocked out. Last year I isolated so bad for the months leading up to it. To the point I almost thought I’d pushed my wife away. This year though, I’m trying to be different. I’ve been in counseling. I’ve cried—really cried—for the first time since my brother passed. For so long I just couldn’t. I don’t know why, but the tears just wouldn’t come. But now they do, and they’re welcome. I’m only just beginning to understand how not only his death, but the years of him in and out of the hospital have affected me. I’m beginning to grieve not only the loss of him, but the loss of the childhood we didn’t get to have. I’m tired of giving away my pain to distractions. Hiding from what’s hurting. For once, I want to sit with this and remember. I’ve learned it’s ok to hurt and to cry. It’s needed even. But it’s hard. So I’m just going to do my best this week. And maybe if someone asks how I’m doing, I’ll be honest this time and let someone sit with me.
SymphonyOfJoudy profile picture
Missing my mom
by SymphonyOfJoudy
Last post
 Tuesday
...See more My mom passed away about a year ago (it would be a year three days after Christmas) and honestly, the pain still hasn't eased, I still miss her a lot, I still catch myself calling out to her even though she isn't going to respond and I still want to hear her say she's proud of me and I want her to laugh with me and I want her to hug me and tease me again. I miss her so unbelievably much every time I remember or talk about her I start to cry, sometimes it gets too unbearable and paired with the ton of stress I have I just start crying.🙁
Elisabeth28 profile picture
Grieving my best friend.
by Elisabeth28
Last post
 Tuesday
...See more My mother was my best friend. I spent almost 2 decades being her caregiver since a small age of 9. I'm now 28 almost 29 next month. She passed away on Christmas last year, which is also 5 days after my birthday. My baby was only 8 months old and now he's 18 months. This being the first year without her, it's honestly the hardest thing I've ever had to do, after her passing we lost everything as well so it's not just her I mourn, it's the life I had before, I hated so much that she was sick almost my entire life, I ended up having built resentment and I feel so horrible for it. I was burnt out and tired, I could only imagine her pain. I miss her so much and with holidays right around the corner I honestly don't know how to be present for my son. I miss you momma.
persephonee84 profile picture
Living Grief
by persephonee84
Last post
 Monday
...See more I once heard the phrase "grief is love with nowhere to go." I hesitate to call what I'm feeling grief, for fear it places my feelings on the same level as those who have experienced death, a grief I can have no comprehension of. The reality, though, is that I don't know what else to call what I'm feeling. I used to be so close to my family. Through my divorce, and parenting kids who quite frankly aren't easy to parent, I have lost those family connections. We are actively left out of social events. Yesterday was a Halloween party at my brother's house that I've gone to every year since I can remember. When I reached out to ask what time we could come, they said they're hosting friends only this year, not family. My family used to be my best friends. We would hang out multiple times a week and get together with our kids for family dinners at least once a week. We would travel and go on vacations together. And that's all gone now. On top of that, I have two neurodivergent teenagers who desperately need me to be a lot more present than I really am, and I recently got laid off. I work in the tech industry, and jobs are dropping like flies. I want so badly to be self-sufficient, to be strong, to be confident. When I went through my divorce, I never thought the loss I would miss most would be my family. Things were better when I was married and pretending everything was OK. There is so much grief in recognizing that people really aren't able to be there for you when life is hard, the way you thought they would be. And I don't expect much. It breaks my heart when my kids ask why they can't see their cousins as much. I absorb as much as I can by telling them it's my choice not to go over. I want to protect them from knowing that they aren't wanted by my family. I want to protect them from the pain I feel, as much as I can, for as long as I can. But today is hard. It's so hard, and I just needed to say it out loud: I'm hurting.
chickenriceandkale profile picture
my sister passed last monday
by chickenriceandkale
Last post
 Sunday
...See more my sister's weed was laced with fentanyl last monday and i'm not taking it well. her funeral is next friday and her mom asked if i wanted to speak, i do but idek know where to start. she had so much to live for, so much planned for her life. she would've turned 21 this december. i've dealt with loss in my life but not like this one. if theres any support groups or anything that you guys could recommend that would be great. i'm not great at really accepting help and let my sadness consume me sometimes, most of the time actually, and i know she wouldn't want this for me. i haven't gotten out of bed since it's happened besides to go to work. i'm a photographer and im so backed up on photos because i just don't have any motivation to do it. i just miss her. she was one of the only people in my life i didnt have to constantly worry about because i knew she was safe. i was supposed to see her the night before, she was gonna meet up with me and my parents to see the fireworks on the river. she never made it to the river that night and i got a text from her stepdad the next day. she had been struggling with her mental health for awhile but she had just told me a few weeks ago that when i told her suicide is selfish, it stuck with her. she was actively still fighting to be here and someone took that from her. idek where to start the healing process of this, i wouldn't with this on my worst enemy.
RaynenSkye528 profile picture
Estranged Parent Hospitalized
by RaynenSkye528
Last post
 Sunday
...See more My dad is in the hospital. He’s suffering from kidney failure and it doesn’t look like he’s going to make it. His wife hates my family and has barred our family from being on his list of emergency contacts. Amidst all of this grief and drama, there’s me…on the other side of the world…without enough money to afford a flight back home. Even if I did have the money, I’d be on the fence about returning home. All I’ve known is toxic family drama. I nearly died escaping the toxic family system. I don’t think my nervous system would be able to handle going back even if just for a few days. If he passes, I’ll have to confront all of the grief and guilt again. I hope I can make it through. p.s. I know this post may seem selfish, and that’s fine. My parents were always quite emotionally selfish. I don’t feel justified for that. I feel instead…resigned. I’ve confronted my parents multiple times on their eating habits and gave easy alternatives to their diet so they don’t end up in the hospital. And they never listened. i couldn’t possibly feel guilty for that, right? …right?
LostNotFound404 profile picture
Grieving me.
by LostNotFound404
Last post
 Sunday
...See more I have been finding it quite sad lately when I see memes about spontaneity or doing something stupid just for the fun of it or being the unpredictable fun friend. I miss that version of me. After being diagnosed with lupus a few months ago, I have had to take time and stop and listen to the small changes in my body to avoid getting sick or having a flare-up. I have given up so much that I have completely shut down my identity, I know who I am, but my health won't allow me the be her anymore. I was the girl to run up the mountain, smell the roses, jump in the lake, get my hands dirty, do it all myself. I used to dance, play sports, hike, paint, read, create, build stuff, you name it. Now... I get lightheaded when I fold the laundry. I am so tired at the end of a work week that I sleep the whole weekend and still get up Monday exhausted. One remotely social Saterday and I am drained. I struggle to keep up with playing with my nephew because I get tired so easily. Dancing, ballet, its completely out of the picture, my body has been broken down to the point that I physically can do the thing I love most anymore. Some symptoms realy scare me, my hands might go numb, twitch and drop things unexpectedly. My feet go blue and feel dead yet painful, some nights I can't breath for no reason, I get headaches and dizzy and pains in random places that scare me because I dont know why it is happening. There is this long list of co-illnesses that just keep growing. Asthma, Raynaud's, tachycardia, IBS, eye issues, nervous system dysfunctions, mental issues, and so forth. It is just really draining and I miss the me before the lupus who could just live.
faithfulBunny8965 profile picture
Vent and feelings
by faithfulBunny8965
Last post
 Sunday
...See more I don't know where to start. There's just so much context. I'm in the process of divorcing my ex husband. We are separated and idk why but it's so hard. He cheated on me multiple times, but I still miss him and I feel terrible because of it. I'd never take him back and I don't miss him tbh, I miss the care and affection he once used to have for me. I miss being held and loved, I miss having my person. It's worse because people all around me have their people, and I don't. I keep wondering if I'll never find my forever person, and that scares me. I don't know where my priorities changed. I didn't used to worry about things like these at all. Just contemplating where I went wrong. He blames me for him cheating btw.

Our warmest welcome to the Grief & Loss Community!

To Join our Community:
- From a phone: click the three dots "..." at the top left and press "Join Community".
- From a computer: click the "+ Join" button to the left.

This is a caring and safe place to share your thoughts and feelings arising from the loss and grief of any kind; losing someone or something important in your life, the loss of friendships and relationships, loss of your past self. These experiences may have occurred very recently, in the distant past, or any time in between.

You are invited to tell your story, write about your emotions, and also support others. Sort by "Recent" and answer their posts from your perspective and with your comforting words.

This is also a place to ask questions about the nature of grieving, how to cope with any associated pain, discomfort or change, and also how to manage the disruption this loss might have caused in your life.

And then, get tentative answers from people who have been in the same situation.

You might join our Check-Ins too, where we meet and exchange ideas around a common topic.


What are the different forum topics for Grief & Loss?

Check-ins from the Community Team: Current and former check-ins for you to join the talk with other members of the Community around a common topic.
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You can help us by simply responding to threads and sharing your story (if you're comfortable). Check-in with us, join a discussion, or start one! Alternatively, you can join us as a Forum Leader. Check out this thread for more information.


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