I NEED SERIOUS ADVICE - PLEASE HELP
Im still on this unmanagable carnival ride and cant find the way out. The stresses of finding an apartment coupled with keeping my basic daily chores has been giving me bad anxiety. My landlord is pressuring me to move out because I asked him to bring this place up to codee. What he is doing breaks lawws and my rights, but if i turn him in I'm very afraid of what he might do to me. Pluse he is a fellon with a big safee full of firreaarms which is another big fellony. I want to find a place to move, and get out but I'm having a really hard time. I don't have anybody to help. I really could use a friend to help me figure a good way out from under this stressful situation. I had called the crisiss line several times in dec. and almost again yesterday. Im very sorry. I know i need to learn to advocatte for myself, but he has bullied me for so long that my fears are preventing my abilities. He let the air out of my tire last week, and he doesnt like my front porch light on and he slapped it which blows the bulb on Saturday. Seven bulbs so far in the last year. He gets drinking and gets very loud, its been worse since i finally spoke up about all that needs fixing. For eight years he made me pay my rent of seven hundred fifty per month in cash and i had to buy the reciept books over the years. He signed each time but he never takes his copy so im pretty sure he hasnt paid any taxes. He makes me share his post box, and sometimes they give me my mail that looks like it was steamed open. Eight years is ninety six monthly payments equals seventy two thousand dollars I've paid so far. If i turned him in for the gunz, the the taxes, plus the illegal apartment that doesnt meets codes he would be in big trouble. I never want to cause problems for anybody. But he is putting me in a very difficult situation. I feel very much in danger and im not a snitch. What should i do?
@feelNeglected77
https://www.hudexchange.info/housing-and-homeless-assistance/homeless-help/
i just thought a good website to have a link to here and just write here if you write here more about what you can afford and where and more details people can post links that are most helpful and what your looking for if your a veteran you could probabally even get a housing grant assistance to buy something
@jennysunrise8
Thank you
I looked and got 2 new phone numbers
to find rooms to rent -
also you can call mobile home parks near you many have some abandoned mobile homes and the owners of the mobile home park just wants someone to pay the lot rent so they will make arrangements to let you stay in the mobile home if you can pay lot rent or if they own the trailer could sell it for a very low price with a promise to fix it up or sell it to you on contract its a good option if you dont have great credit or a lot of money and its less complicated than getting a bank loan and mobile home lot owners i think might be more willing to do things in a more casual way than a roommate arrangement if you need to move somewhere very fast even though the landlord told you 2 months free him not wanting to put that in writing and what you know about him its safer to assume youll need to find somewhere very soon
good luck 
@jennysunrise8
I really appreciate your giving me some new direction and providing me with this great idea with the links. Your the best J!🌷
Good News!
I dont want to get my hopes up to much just in case it doesnt work out, but I might have found a good place to move to. I used the link www.roomgo.net and contacted several people, then got a call last night and had a nice long talk about a room being finished. Its a small addition which the person is finishing the insulation, walls, etc. which will be available soon and says pics of the progress will be sent to me as it's being done. If this works out, I will be out of this bad situation. I woke up this morning with my normal challenges, but made my bed and hit the shower and trying to improve my outlook so I can leave as much of my depressive baggage behind when i move. A fresh start in a place with a nice good natured person will help me thrive again. When you have you "will" and are setting and attaining goals life can be very enjoyable. Wish me luck. Thanks Jenny!🌷🌷
@feelNeglected77
im glad you got a call back from someone and it sounds perfect for you and maybe this will be the place but like you said yourself dont get your hopes up on this one place and stop looking its always good to have a couple backup plans as many as you can manage setting up just in case this doesnt fall through and a few others you still have a few options to choose from so the more backups you have the better you dont know the future or other peoples motivations or thinking ... but it does sound perfect for you just keep looking every day call and ask today tomorrow and the next day as if you never found this place keep collecting options and backup plans for yourself and dont send any money to anyone online ;)
@jennysunrise8
Yes, I thought the stress would go away, but realize how things change for many reasons. Its hard to know what or who, if anybody in those ads to trust. I will not send money, thanks for all this great advice!!🌷
@feelNeglected77
even if it is a trustworthy person even that person doesnt know what will happen in the future maybe a family member of his will need a place to stay or bad health problems might happen with him in the future who knows just always good to have some backup plans but i hope this works out yea its stressful not knowing i hope you know soon either way but in the meantime keep looking and collecting options for yourself just in case the unexpected happens <3
@jennysunrise8
Yes, thank you. Im adding all the numbers to my contacts now, and will begine my calls about the trailers, what was that word for the trailer dealings?
Thanks so much!🌷
@feelNeglected77
its called a lonnie deal when a person who owns a trailer park has some trailers in the park that are abandoned and not collecting any lot rent for them its a good idea to read up on it online ways to make sure the person who owns the trailer park owns the trailers (there when the owner bought the place or given to settle a debt exc.) or has some official agreement in writing with the owners to allow you to stay in the abandoned units/buy on contract while you pay lot rent so theres some things to be careful about and good idea to read a little about it online the link you posted above looks like a good place to find out more and learn what to ask how to bring it up and what to ask - but in a day or two if you just set aside a few days to call every place around you theres just a limited number of parks and would prob be a good idea to do that first get it out of the way and then spending time on the roommate websites
@jennysunrise8
Oh yes, wow. I read about a guy that bough n fixed one up but then the real owner came back and claimed it 😲
Thanks again very much🌷
@jennysunrise8
I've spent about 100 hours looking into lonnie deal opportunitues but its very difficult find one, let alone doing all the nessesary research needed. After the sale a new set of problems presents, the rules change after the sales because park owers are using lonnie deals to make others pay for the upgrades needed. For instance, some purchases open the new owners up to expensive heating system upgrades, some require new lot leases, some park owners prevent the trailers from staying on the property. Sometimes a simple clerical change of park ownership is tge louphole trick they use to enforce these unexpected requirments to new owners. Its been an education to say the least but my time is running out. 7 weeks lsft now to have a place to go. The stress is overwhelming. I have to throw of give away everythibg I own to be able to fit in a shared room situation. Nothing is selling because its winter. My prices are almost giving things away now. I may leave it all for the landlord to deal with. Its impossible for me to clean and get rid of it all. Im very ill, cant barely walk, and have no help. Im trying not to give up with all my strength, and fighting to stay calm. Just keeping myself fed, chired done, and clean is real work. Ahhhhhhh😦
For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us
I am glad that you decided to move away from that place. I am sure that you made the right decision. After moving out though you should return the favour of 8 years of his bullying by reporting to irs & others. :)
@sincereNectarine8263
Hi, thank you. He has a wife and a young daughter that would suffer greatly if I did that. He absolutely deserves it, but I cant damage a family. I know how deeply devistating that is because it happened to me. And I want a clean future with no ties to the past. Thank you for caring. I really appreciate your thoughts. I have recently lost 2 dear friends over this because they advised me the same thing and I didn't take their advice. They said to me "You ask for help but then just make excuses" They were ver mean to me and seem to be like "Why dont you do this or do that??" And when I explain how ive done them all, they rudely and meanly said you always have an excuse. I have followed attempted and seeked help for two years pertaining to my physical health, mental health, this rent situation and never missed an appointment. I have no resources, but found ways. I now am realizing it wad they that were looking for reasons not to help me. Im on my own with the exception of this 7cups family.
Thanks.
Much love and care🖒
@feelNeglected77
I understand that you're having anxiety about what he might do to you if you turn him in, but, overall, he doesn't seem to be a very good person. He's a felon and that is not the way you deserve to live. I feel you should do what you think is in your best interest, even though you're afraid, it's the best thing for you. Stay safe and remember you're important and loved. (:
@theidioticpigeon
this is an extremely late post to this, my bad. but i'm glad you're moving too
@theidioticpigeon
Im so afraid that if i did turn him in with no back up plan at all, i could end up harmed, homeless or worse. I think about this every day and the pressure is intencely affecting my.mental health. I almost gave up 3 days ago. Its bad here. His wife is home all day but she fears him so she avoids talks with me like she used to do. She is even crewl to me when he is around. Its like im living in a bad dream
Thank you for your kindness!🖒
I'll check back later. I'm going to keep looking so I can hopefully find other places to go just in case.
Thank you everybody!
@feelNeglected77 Are there any local authority houses in your area? Or emergency accomodation which the council could provide. I'm guessing you live state side so I know that the system will be different. But the local authority should be able to help. Do you have a citizens advice bureau or information hub that could help you out. An organisation that could advocate on your behalf and help you get out of there. Mainly I want to say to you that you may feel alone but you're not. There are people here who care and who want to support you. I'm thinking of you and really hoping that your situation will improve soon.
Take good care of yourself, sending you hugs
Sooty
@sooty41
Big thank you! I have been to about 12 appointments through the social services and from there reached out for an advocate but sadly here the budget has reduces to crusis levels and only homeless shelters are available and from there they are doing rent vouchers which is 3 steps back before any hope of moving forward. I used several links to reach out for critical housing, and even Veterans emergency funds, but they will pay a rent one time. Im desperately looking for more options. A lot of scams in the hoysing ads make it a situation i need to learn fast. Its hard because the rich bought up most of the housing creating rents that are unreasonable. Homelessness is what scares me the most. Im not well and pray it wont come to that. Im going to be back later. Thank you so much for your concerns and help
🌷
@feelNeglected77 So glad to hear from you and so sorry that your situation is so difficult right now. My main priority would be for you to remain safe. I wouldn't challenge this guy, some others might disagree, but your safety comes first. He sounds like a bully and will get his come uppance at some point in his life. You sound like you are trying all avenues and I'm sure this will prove positive for you, hopefully soon. Could you have a couple of nights away, say staying with friends, just to get away from it all for a while and give you some breathing space? You are in my thoughts and please stay safe.
Hugs, Sooty
@sooty41 😊
Im headed out but hope to talk more very soon. Thank you very much. I appreciate you and your wisdom!!
Blessings!!😊
@sooty41
I've got some days to be away coming in about 2 weeks to stay in a friend home with their elderly grandma. I'm looking forward to it, and dreading it because of what the landlord might do in here while I'm away. I take all my reciepts with me everywhere and other important papers, just in case. But the first free month Feb, will be unofficially late on feb. 10 and if his offer was a trick, im scared i will come home to seeing my things on the curb, and the locks changed. If he dies that, i will be forced to call the police, and go to the courts, and turn him in for tax evasion and firearms, but I'm not healthy and ut would be very hard and extremely stressful. He doesnt use logic, so is unpredictable. I will be back late tonight.
Thank you very much for you kind advice. Its very good advice which I'm trying to follow. Lets talk again soon!🌷😊
@feelNeglected77
What he is doing isn't right. If you don't feel safe there I would call 911 when you are at work. Ask them to tell him that it was anonomyous so no one will know it was you. I am really sorry that you are in this position. Stand up for yourself. This is your life and it isn't run by others.
@Dreamer3240 Thank you
I know your right but I fear retrobution. Im just one person, he has a huge family and people that work in the court, and for the state. He made sure to make that clear to me. He is damaged from all his drinking, he hunts and has a lot of weapons in a big safe.
In the past, I suffered a huge injustice and learned that "its not what you know, it's who you know". I've tasted the injustice and suffered from it for a very long time. He is a felon so i dont know how he can have all that hunting equipment. Nothing makes sence. He has rented this apartment to 4 different people sence 1998 and I'm sure he paid no taxes. When I see blantant law breaking like he does, I have to be careful. I really appreciate your advice. I went to friends for dinner tonight and talked about this. They said what you said. But its me that might end up hurt ir worse. I wish I knew how to handle it in a safe way. If i get lucky and find a place I would feel so much pressure lift off my heart.
Much appreciation!!🖒
@feelNeglected77
Also you may want to talk to someone that you know like a friend or a colleuge. Maybe also get someone to help you find a new apartment.
