Life is painful
I've been here long enough to appreciate and hate this community. Appreciate beacause there are some gems in this community that i look up to. Hate because there are many who gave me painful memories in here. I find it hard to talk. I rarely vent because by the time i reach this website i just don't know where to start, and why. I get creepy listeners at times when i actually need help and there are times I've found amazing listeners too.
Back to the topic. Life is painful. Every single day i just wish i was never there. I just wish i never had to see all of this pain. Every time i see someone else, I'm reminded of why i have to suffer alone. Why aren't there people to help me out of my misery? Why aren't people understanding me?
I had a small chat with a person today and while we were talking, they pointed out at another person saying "look at that person, they suffered a lot unlike you. They have gone through a lot you don't even know". As i saw the person, i recognized them instantly. Yes, they'd gone through a lot. But they tried to destroy my life too. Yes, they suffered, but what about me? Yes, they are not doing well now, but how am i doing? I'm the same. I just didn't tell anyone. I just kept my smile so that no one blames me for being sad. I just acted happy so that i don't get called crazy like i got called once. I suffer just to make the people around me happy. What about mine?
@loyalBlueberry7653 Hi Blueberry! I would agree with all you've just said. I too have been here on 7 Cups for quite a long time, and I will say there are a few wonderful people around here. But truth be told, there are so many bad listeners who will make us feel worse than we already are. Some listeners come here just to be popular, have many reviews, and once you leave them a review are appreciate something of theirs, they'll become rude and unsupportive. So many listeners give advice, even when they aren't supposed to. Some listeners come here just to fulfil their sexual desires. All these can and do leave members (myself included) with bad or even painful memories. It makes it even harder, to be honest and share your feelings with someone. There surely are some amazing listeners, but it's pretty hard to come across one (in my opinion). Most listeners on 7 Cups need more training.
It often seems that we're the only one suffering with something. Even though it may not always be true, it's what our brain tells us. To be honest, I don't know the answers to your questions, and they are questions that puzzle me too.
People do point out that "your problems are nothing compared to theirs/mine". I've been there so many times myself. That's something that makes me believe they my problems are indeed not significant, only to later realize that they are significant, just like everyone else's. Everyone's problems are equally big and valid, and everyone goes through big and small problems. My horrible school counsellor once said that children these days haven't seen struggle, on our very first session without even getting to know me. A lot of times, people don't truly know us and our problems/struggles before they say something like that. They may have gone through a lot, and so has everyone else. They may have suffered, and so has every one of us. A lot of people assume that we're doing great just because we, whether intentionally or not, "look" okay, or just because our situation doesn't sound as dramatic as someone else's.
That's the harsh reality. I agree with all you've said and can relate to it. You've seemingly put all my thoughts and feeling into perfect words. I appreciate you for making this thread, it takes a lot of courage.
@exuberantBlackberry9105
This is beautiful blackberry. I'm so glad you shared your views too. Thank you so much for that. It makes me feel happy and known. You're a wonderful person.
@loyalBlueberry7653 Thank you so much, Blueberry! I'm also very glad that you could come here to share your feelings, because I have very similar feelings about these things, but never had the courage to publicly share them until I saw other people like you do it. I really appreciate your post, and it is great to talk to other people who have similar feelings about things. I'm glad I could make you feel better, and trust me, you have made me feel better too. You are a beautiful person, and you make me feel happy because by sharing your experiences and feelings, you are helping others realize that they aren't alone.
