Eva’s Crazy Mind
i’ve wanted to make a forum post like that for quite a while now, but never brought myself to actually make it. here i will write up all sorts of thoughts and vents, everything i need to get off my mind. it’s not gonna be positive or motivational, not even close. i personally don’t recommend reading it just because it doesn’t help lol. you’re welcome to read, replies are okay, just be aware that it’s gonna be a pretty dark place. i don’t usually ask for help despite telling everybody to. idk why. i’m not a very good example of what’s right to do. TW just in case, not planning to go that far but who knows.
i’m making myself this space because sometimes you can feel lonely while being surrounded by a million people and that’s nobody’s fault.
best wishes to you. ❤️
drinking water - bad idea. got it. 👍
6am ~
@justmeeva
*sits with you if ok*
@LoveMyMoonflowers
*sits with nibuddy* 🩷
@justmeeva
*offers hugs*
@LoveMyMoonflowers
*gladly accepts hugs*
@justmeeva
💜
@LoveMyMoonflowers
🩷
i’m so useless today. i could’ve done some of the overdue school stuff but this stupid sickness keeps me in bed and i can’t do anything about it.
stress stress stress
dear mother, i don’t want ‘things at home’ to become a part of my life description so maybe, let’s not.
@justmeeva
*sits with you if okie*
💜
okay so one thing that comes with this whole ‘derealisation, not being here’ stuff (at least i *think* they’re connected..?), is that i get mindblown so easily by such random facts. here’s what we have today.
ever thought about how you have your own life, then your family members each have their own lives, then the people in the house next to you each have their own lives, and so on? *a b s o l u t e l y m i n d b l o w n* it’s just insane to think about. i can’t wrap my head around it. it’s basically impossible to my brain. woah.
came across this one video and damn it hits hard.
“when children are young, they’re told not to talk to strangers. when they go to school, they’re told not to talk to the person next to them. and finally when they get to be very old, they’re told not to talk to themselves. who’s left?”
a little googling and found out it’s a dialogue from a (quite old) tv show called ‘mork & mindy’.
Mork: This week I discovered a terrible disease called loneliness.
Orson: Do many people on Earth suffer from this disease?
Mork: Oh yes sir, and how they suffer. One man I know suffers so much he has to take a medication called bourbon. Even that doesn’t help very much because then he can hear paint dry.
Orson: Does bedrest help?
Mork: No because I’ve heard that sleeping alone is part of the problem. You see, Orson, loneliness is a disease of the spirit. People who have it think that no one cares about them.
Orson: Do you have any idea why?
Mork: Yes sir, you can count on me. You see, when children are young, they’re told not to talk to strangers. When they go to school, they’re told not to talk to the person next to them. Finally when they’re very old, they’re told not to talk to themselves, who’s left?
Orson: Are you saying Earthlings make each other lonely?
Mork: No sir, I’m saying just the opposite. They make themselves lonely – they’re so busy looking out for number one that there’s not enough room for two.
Orson: It’s too bad everybody down there can’t get together and find a cure.
Mork: Here’s the paradox, sir, because if they did get together, they wouldn’t need one.
@justmeeva "because if they did get together, they wouldn't need one"
God. Just...wow
*sits 13 hours late*
my brain’s doing everything to try to convince me i’m in danger. again. i’m not. what is this? it makes me hear noises, it makes me think i see something or- someone- that’s not there. cool~…
tw - bad, unhealthy thinking.
the one, only thing i “liked” about being sick was that i ate basically nothing those two days. two whole days, and i didn’t really feel hunger at all. kinda wish it was always like this.
…….
visiting my fake reality land again tonight. hello, home.
(it’s a bad idea, i know. but.. i need it right now. it’s gonna mess me up even more afterwards but idec. don’t have the time to care. besides, when have i been good at making the right decisions anyway?)
