life 9

not doing well but not doing good i dont know much and that is scaring me i need to know i need to remember i need to wake up i need to get it together and think i need to REMEMBER i need to i need to know why i am like this but i cant remember if i cant remember then i will think did it ever happen ... i think not know . and thats horrible i need to remember damn it i need to or i might lose who i was and become someone else and that is whats so terrifying . imagine if you stopped existing and someone else was in your body and you coud do nothing that does not sound good to me  i used to fear it so much i was scared to sleep because what if when i woke up it woud not be me .