subtly changing

I'm AFAB. She/they pronouns. technically I'm a demigirl. I consider myself non-binary/genderless, but with a very very small attachment to being female. I'm closeted to my family. I know they wouldn't accept me if I were to come out. I feel uncomfortable with dresses, makeup, anything society would most likely consider 'feminine'. Holly is an alias. My real name is feminine as well, but can be changed to be gender neutral. I don't really even feel like a woman anymore. I'm changing on the inside. But my outside doesn't reflect my changes quite yet. My problem is that I'm trying to tread carefully without being caught. But I'm scared and annoyed. Any tips? Support?