I’m gay boy living in Iran
I’m a 24 years old gay boy living in Iran 😞 (still trying to figure out who I am). I believe who I am is being denied and demonized by my family and people. I believe I’m being gaslit, silenced, and psychologically oppressed. I’ve been going through hurtful times for many many years. But regardless of how many times my family and people and Drs been telling me that I’m crazy and need to be fixed. Drs have said I’m psychotic and gave me pills for many years. I’m sure it’s not all me. it must be the environment and their lack of understanding of me. I've been living in a cultural and traditional straight jacket all my life. Lately, I’m worried that they are maybe trying to gaslight me into thinking I’m trans ( because unlike homosexuality which is illegal and unacceptable trans people are tolerated. And they even force homosexual people to have a sex change. Iran claims itself to be a heaven for trans people but it's a fat lie. Sex change is the only way to survive even as a trans person. Which still is a transphobic country beside being blatantly homophobic ). I appreciate if you guide and help me. I don’t think this could be paranoia (what I’m feeling about my identity and how I’m being treated. And I do agree I need help from a therapist for improving my life. But it needs the right, honest, supportive people. But nobody validates how I feel and I’m always deemed unhinged and sick. So I kinda don’t know what I should do. Now I'm devastated for how every day of my life gets worse. The situation is so dire for me. I do get threatening signals. ( that's right I don't get beaten but psychological oppression is way worse) I think I'm being erased. I swear I'm not crazy what can I do? I know I have to flee and escape to save myself but I don't have any money or power. To live in a nontoxic place with dignity and respect and without bigotry. What can I do? I've been meaning to ask people to help me. But I know it would sound stupid and selfish of me. why would everyone care? I mean I can’t even make a *** account here someone outside of Iran told me ( maybe he lied I don’t know ) he tried to make a *** account to help me flee. But that’s still not something you can't put there. I mean why would someone do such a huge help? Which the idea is far fetched too. I've also considered marrying a woman. But honestly, I can't even think straight and my acting is awful. But still, I don't want them to erase me or to heal the truth. Or keep treating me like I'm crazy. I really appreciate your comments and ideas! 🙏🏻🙏🏻🌼🌞💐🌈
@greenDog1739
Hey greenDog, it is really brave of you to share here your experience of being Gay in a country that does not support this. I don't have much experience in this area but I wanted to send you some love and encouragement to keep posting and talking here.
Take Care
x
@greenDog1739
Your situation certainly sounds very overwhelming and like it is hindering your overall wellbeing. It's hard to say what kinds of options there may be for help, there are organizations that try to help but it is my understanding that they have so many wanting help and are only to help some due to limited resources etc. But it may still be worth looking in to some of those organizations if that is what you feel you want for yourself.
I don't want to assume, but it sounds like you are wanting to flee overall? What would that look like for you? Are there ways to work up to that as a possibility for you even without support? What might that take?
Unfortunately I do not have answers, but I hope that you may be able to find some options for yourself that don't require erasing your identity or risking your safety.
It can be hard to know what to say when the situation is so complicated, but we are here listening, so hopefully you will continue to share with us.
@greenDog1739
My advice is:
Seek finical Independence, then when you are out of your family grasp do what you want and how you want without having to worry so much.