I need opinions
So I m a girl a teen but I need an answer by some men here. The thing is that my father's opinions made me question what is true and what is not. So... I want youse all to tell me your opinion
My father tells me that women are weaker than men (and he doesnt mean just physically which i agree that women are weaker than men physically if they dont train). He tells me that men will always rule women and that men let women into jobs just to have something nice to touch or see (I dont want to get into his details). He told me that money spent on women going to college is a waste of money and stuff like that
My question is that is every man thinking like this? How much are his words true? I mean i never believed them but hearing them constantly i started to question whether his words were true. So I decided to ask the men of this site what do you think about it. Are his words true or not? Why would he possibly say stuff like that to his own child?
Thank you and sorry if I sounded dumb.
@independentWatermelon1572
@mytwistedsoul
Thank you so much for your kind words. I m just trying to see what other men think and if its only my dad thinking like this
@independentWatermelon1572 Nothing wrong with wanting other people opinions. :) I hope more men will give their opinions too! I know that hearing those sort of things can really make you start to doubt yourself. It's good to get other people's thoughts
@mytwistedsoul
Yeah. Thank you for answering me though! Take care
I don't think generalizations are helpful.
Also, strength can be measured in many different ways. One person may be physically stronger while another can tolerate more discomfort. One person may take criticism and use it to make themselves better while another falls apart from the same criticism.
In life we need to take advantage of our individual strengths and work to improve our weaknesses.
On average men are different than women although individually each of us is unique. In my mind this means a person can't categorically declare one gender is stronger than another. It depends on which aspect of strength you're referring to and which individuals you're referring to.
@indigoHickory5451
Thank you for answering! I just was confused for what my father tells me rhe whole time and wanted to see if other men think the same
@independentWatermelon1572 Your father has his opinions based on what he was taught and his life experiences. As you grow and mature you can establish your own beliefs based on your experience. While I believe we should be respectful of our parents beliefs it doesn't mean we ultimately have to adopt them as our own.
@indigoHickory5451
I understand what you say but he is really degrading me and I dont know if I can actually respect that. I feel guilty though to be honest for one thing: the fact that I know both my parents act so toxic because they had toxic households themselves and I feel guilty for not being able to help, interfere at their fights, try to reason them and maybe stop blaming them and try to forgive them which is really hard to be honest.
@independentWatermelon1572 You certainly don't have to respect the fact he's degrading you. I simply meant be respectful in your dealings with your father even though you disagree with his attitudes.
It is not a child's responsibility to fix their parents. You have enough challenges taking care of yourself. I think of it like what I call the "airplane theory" put on your own oxygen mask before attempting to assist others. You need to make sure you are safe and secure before you are in a position to consider helping anyone else.
I would suggest avoiding conflict with your father. You're not going to change him. Find resources for yourself to help nurture your strength and become the kind of person you would respect.
@indigoHickory5451
Thank you so much 🥹
Children love their parents but a child's endurance and experience of suffering is far lower. If you try to out last the disfunction you see you will be worn down first.
Please use your energy to grow. The daoist have a saying you look at the rock accept it see its beauty and eventually remove a-bit to reveal more beauty.
I instantly dislike your father but compared to taliban in Afghanistan or those even worse they fight is he bad?
You want to help you can find experts who work with men like your father and women who pick them. Once you have the skill, you can return to the original stones who motivated you to sculpt.
I did with my parents my mum was fairly quick I occasionally return to show her something new when she is ready, my dad was extremely difficult. He was not like your dad but very ridged did not like changing and had a-lot of support.
Children love their parents but a child's endurance and experience of suffering is far lower. If you try to out last the disfunction you see you will be worn down first.
Please use your energy to grow. The daoist have a saying you look at the rock accept it see its beauty and eventually remove a-bit to reveal more beauty.
I instantly dislike your father but compared to taliban in Afghanistan or those even worse they fight is he bad?
You want to help you can find experts who work with men like your father and women who pick them. Once you have the skill, you can return to the original stones who motivated you to sculpt.
I did with my parents my mum was fairly quick I occasionally return to show her something new when she is ready, my dad was extremely difficult. He was not like your dad but very ridged did not like changing and had a-lot of support.
@DancingDaoist
Yeah i know and thank you for commenting me. Its just that I wanted to know if all men think like that.
I ll try to do what you told me and i appreciate the advice
Take care and be safe please 🫂
@independentWatermelon1572, father of a 15-year-old trans boy here. What your father is saying isn't constructive or helpful, and I'm sorry you're dealing with that. As a dad, I couldn't imagine thinking that way. It doesn't matter if someone thinks women (or female-presenting) are weaker physically or mentally; that's just not true. There are plenty of men who are just as fragile as anyone else. Those are his own insecurities pouring out to you, unfortunately. Keep your head up, kid. Words are strong, but your actions will speak volumes.
@EulalioPirozzi
Thank you for your comment and sweet words. I ll try to keep my head up
A quick question: did the accept you being trans immediately?
Thank you again
Take care and be safe 🫂
My child is the one who is trans,I was the first person he came out to even before his mother. There was no judgement and I have always instilled in him to be who he wants to be not who he “needs” to be. Love is love and you can’t control that.
@EulalioPirozzi
Sorry I read the first sentence wrong. I re read it now and understood.
I m glad you are supporting your kid! I wish my father was like you.
Take care and be safe! Hug your kid for me as well!
Thanks for commenting
Sending courage🫂
