How to be motivated or like want it enough

I dont want to draw anymore i just dont want to do anything

My biggest accomplishments are just cleaning my room or doing my laundry

Outside i hate the fact that people see me

I avoid social places like the cafe and ive spent a majority of my time hiding in the library or in some stupid corner where nobody can find me

As if anyone would look for me ouuu

I just feel like i dont want to grow up and that is so pathetic

I just want someone to constantly take care of me and keep me safe

I feel like ive had no real life experiences, personal or in the workforce or socially

Everyone else is accomplishing so much and im just so worthless in my room alone and ik that if i keep going like this ill truly amount to absolutely nothing in my life

Im scared that so far its not enough to get me out of bed

Im going to be like bitter and alone when im forty lololol

Idk how to fix this i really dont

Im just so scared and stuck up to actually try in anything new or do anything becasue im scared theyll all laugh at me like i dont know what to do abt it

I feel so pathetic i just want someone to save me and i cant get it through my head i cant wait for that and i have to get up