Recent struggles with trich

I'm making a post on here because I don't know who else I can talk to about this. None of my friends or family understand this issue I have in the slightest, and any time I bring it up to someone I love and trust, their response is just "it's just hair" or "it doesn't look that bad to me." 

My hair is controlling my life. I do not have OCD, as far as I know, but I have ADHD, autism, and sensory processing disorder, and have struggled with BFRB's for as long as I can remember. I believe this is mostly a symptom of my sensory issues and sensory seeking nature.

I used to just deal with skin picking for the most part, and while it did cause me major insecurities and other issues, I didn't feel like all that much of a freak for it, since I was a teenager at the time, and since many teenagers have bad skin, my scabby face didn't make me stand out. However, in the past year or so, the BFRB i struggle with the most is trichotillomania. It all started when I got a heavily layered haircut with thick, side-swept bangs, since this haircut made me constantly feel the need to touch my hair and adjust it on my head. The thick bangs and thinner/longer layers also caused my hair to become a big sensory issue for me, since I didn't like how they felt sticking to my head. I developed a habit of twirling, twisting, pulling, and breaking my hair for hours on end. My dead ends became extremely severe of course, but I was too embarrassed and broke to go to a hair dresser, so I tried to trim my hair myself, and failed miserably, giving myself the worst haircut of my entire life. This terrible haircut has made the sensory issues I get from my hair so much worse. I am absolutely addicted to messing around with all the uneven lengths, course ends, etc. My hair has barely grown an inch in 6 months, because I break my ends so frequently. I am too embarrassed to go to a hairdresser. I feel so hideous. The worst part is for once, I don't feel insecure about most aspects of my appearance (my face, my body, my clothes) but I don't remember the last time I felt pretty or confident, all because of my hair. 

I cancel plans and avoid leaving the house because I don't want anybody to see how bad my hair looks. 

Despite hating what I am doing to myself, I spend hours on end looking in the mirror, destroying my hair even further.

It's possible for me to use self control, but my hair is constantly on my mind. Every time I look at a picture of someone else online, I stare at their hair, and think about how normal and good it looks in comparison to my own.

I don't know what else to say. I don't know if I'm looking for advice, reassurance, someone who relates, or what. I just needed to get this out there.