Coming to terms with an OCD problem. Advice?
So, this is going to be the first time I'm actually directly addressing a very possible problem with OCD. I was diagnosed with anxiety when I was around 14, but it was the generalized kind that usually accompanied my depression (I used to get panic attacks when I was younger but thankfully I rarely have them these days). But I believe I've actually had OCD for a rather long time, but I never have brought it up to a therapist or psychologist before because I felt I could handle it on my own.
Well now it's just getting annoying. I am having a harder time handling the racing, obsessive thoughts and uncontrolled thinking patterns. I think things that I don't mean all the time and they just repeat over in my mind. Sometimes I even mutter those thoughts under my breath and I just hope that nobody notices when I do it in public.
What's worse, whenever I pass by a wall or a doorway/doorhandle, I have to touch or graze it momentarily. Sometimes when I pass through thresholds, I repeat the process a second time before I am satisfied. Sometimes i have to even rub my foot against the edge of the door. There was one time my grandpa noticed this habit and questioned me about it, but I just brushed it off like it was nothing important.
Well now I'm starting to wonder if I should talk to a therapist about it, but to be honest, I'm kind of embarrassed that this happens to me. Like I can't be a normal person who just walks by a wall, but I have to graze my hand over it because something in my mind is telling me that if I don't something bad will happen.
I am unfamiliar with OCD treatment in general (since I just take citalopram for general anxiety) but I'd really like some input or possible coping strategies? If there is medication, what does it do and is it similar to the general anxiety medication that's out there? I'd really appreciate some advice. Thanks :)
Hey, I've suffered through very severe OCD, it's a serious mental illness, there is no reason to be embarrassed. I personally think it'd be best for you to tell your therapist as soon as possible. I, like you, once considered my OCD embarrassing and something that needed to be hidden, but after hiding it for a while it got worse, to the point there was no way it could've been hidden. Please get treatment, hiding it hurts more than any embarrassment. With proper treatment you can get it under control, and even go into remission
@Dubhshlaine326 Thanks for the response and advice! Yeah I really wanted to be able to just live with it, but it's just not working for me anymore. You're right, it does just get worse as time goes on, since I'm only really able to get rid of the compulsions temporarily through distraction. But even then it does nothing to stop my uncontrolled thoughts and muttering.
Thanks again :)
Oh, and the usual treatment is cognitive behavioral therapy and antidepressants. Of course as it goes on they'll delve into why you have your obsessions and slowly get you to go against them, so you realize that "the world won't end" if you don't carry through your compulsive behaviors. It can be a bit stressful, but it does help a lot.
