The "Prize" Wheel

I realized sometime yesterday that the racing, uncontrollable thoughts that play into compulsions can be compared to a prize wheel. It's like my mind is the wheel, and the prizes are the thoughts. When I spin the wheel, my brain has no control over where my thoughts go, and they also have no control over what my next thought will be, whether it will be a good thought, bad thought, or uncomfortable thought. Just like people don't have control over where the marker will land, I don't have control over where my thoughts will go, and that is so scary to me.

Because If it's a bad thought, I have to 'spin' again until it's good enough. Over and over again.