reassurance and intrusive thoughts
hi
recently ive been having a lot of trouble within my closest friendships to keep balance. i've always has a reassurance compulsion and i have been told that asking for constant reassurance is bad, but i can't stop doing it. additionally, i've had intrusive thoughts about that are really aggressive, and i can't handle the compulsion or projecting these onto my friends. this can be lying, passive aggressively, etc. i've always considered myself an honest person and used communication as a way to work through problems, but i just feel like i'm now causing all of the problems. i've convinced myself i dont know how to socialize and that every relationship i'm ever in will be fleeting, and i can't tell whether what i'm going through is caused by my OCD or if i am just manipulating people and not realizing it. i've been trying to grapple this for a while but i keep sending things that lead to disaster and i don't know how to stop. let me know if anyone has experienced something like this
@kr3290 you must try to breathe, take few moments to think before you speak as people have different ways in processing the words are said to them. Try to think like if i was in their shoes how does it makes me feel to hear such words? Like for instance, instead of saying wow you sound like a jerk right now, you can say sounds like you're not having a nice day. These both has the same meaning of pinpointing the annoying acts the other person has been imitating, the only difference is it would sound less harsh. Patience is the key.
Take care💖
Hey @kr3290 ,
I know that you're going through a wave of different emotions and experiences as you face this issue of not really being able to maintain relationships. I want you to know that you are not the problem and that your reactions are a result of your emotions. Being able to manage emotions can be hard, but I think it's good to remember that as long as we are constantly seeking self-improvement and development, we are able to keep going in life. I have also had a similar experience in the past where I was always concerned about my ability to keep long-term relationships. I'm glad that you have been able to use communication in the past but you might want to give consideration to the fact that the situations you may have been facing have been outside of your control. I find that this is often the case when we are healthy individuals but the parties involved are not; their reactions make it hard for us to know if what we are doing for ourselves is inherently right or wrong. Anyhow, enough of my rant - I just want to make sure that your thoughts are heard and that you are not alone in this process. <3 Thank you for being a Listener and sharing these experiences with us!