Chat Between @jesusredeemedme2425 and @sadcat13
I haven’t noticed you posting for awhile (maybe I just haven’t seen the right posts lol), but I was getting worried about you and wanted to see how you’re doing <3
@jesusredeemedme2425 awww, thank you for checking on me, it means a lot to me. I´ve been feeling horrible lately. Please skip reading and let me know if you have triggers around health anxiety/ocd.
My ocd is acting up in one of the worst ways it ever did. It is preventing me from drinking and limits my hydratation without thinking i am hurting myself with overhydration and my brain will burst or my kidney will be damaged. Trying my best to manage it, talked to both my doctor a few days ago when i went there for a check up after covid so decided to use it as an opportunity to get a credible resource instead of google. I also talked to my therapist today. I´m trying to get better but it is still not back to normal. The anxiety and bad drinking schedule makes me exhausted and stressed so haven´t been around lately as i was trying to deal with it. My doctor told me I am safe as long as i don´t do a water chugging youtube challange and since i have healthy kidneys my body will simply self regulate the water and get rid of the excess and we came to interesting conclusions in my therapy too so hoping for it to be better soon.
Sorry I took so long to respond!
That sounds yucky :( Is it a legit fear or simply an OCD intrusive thought? I have OCD too <3
Rhats the first thing I was thinking, those dudes who chugged legit gallons at once. Crazy people. Lol
So tell me about you? <3
@jesusredeemedme2425 it's ok, don't worry, I will find it
It is more then an intrusive thought I would say, because as a compulsion I severely limit my hydration. I have health OCD for the most part, and one time during summer I drank a lot of water on a family gathering and felt bad (although I'm sure I ate stuff I shouldn't have so it is very likely the feeling bad was mostly due to food) but my brain saved it as I surely must have poisoned myself with water (despite both my allergologist and my GP telling me If I drank around those 2l in a few hours and have healthy kidneys I shouldn't be worried and feel bad at worst) so. My brain saved it as water being bad. Then avoiding drinking much for few days. And then all went back to normal. And now suddenly for whatever reason my brain just pulled it out randomly. And gave me a presentation on why I have water poisoning and how it will cause my demise. So would say an intrusive thought that is out of control with a dangerous compulsion is pretty fair description of it.
Luckily I'm doing much better now and back to more or less intuitive drinking. My doc calmed me down so hoping this will soon be a forgotten behaviour.
How about your OCD? What's your subtype? It sucks so hard to deal with it. OCD has literally no bright side. Like. I don't mind my ADHD. I think it makes me who I am. Sure I get distracted by anything but I also freak out when my brain goes quiet and I have to use manual thinking instead randomly throwing prompts at it and it doing the thinking for me. And I'm totally fine with that. We even jokingly call my ADHD Jerry because of a time when my brain went quiet at one time after sleep deprived uni project day and the first thing I blurted out to my boyfriend was "I think I *offed* Jerry". And when my boyfriend asked what do I mean I told him the voice in my head just disappeared and I'm just in my own head screaming in the void to fill the silence and try to restart it. And since then he simply can't think in other terms of my ADHD other then Jerry because it stuck with him. My boyfriend tells me the quiet manual is literally how his brain is all the time and I'm just like wait what. This is insufferable. So I think there definitely is a silver lining to ADHD. OCD? Not fun. Just a few of the 24 hours spent in crippling fear and anxiety over objectively irrational stuff.
Anyway. I'm off to work and the bus made it it's mission to make me late. It was late yesterday so I didn't catch my switch. I have 5 minutes to switch buses on the same stop I get off of the firstone. 5. That's like plenty to even crawl here. But nahh. Today there was a huge traffic jam for some reason. Why is there a traffic at 10:20 on a work day is a mystery to me. But well. Guess what happened. I didn't catch the bus. The bus in front of us passed the light and we did not. Just enough for my other bus to leave. Only good thing is I bought water yesterday so I don't need to go to the store before and that my coworkers don't care about if I arrive 10 mins before or after I'm supposed to. Just can't overshoot it by a lot what I am careful not to do. But. I'm having 2 more days and thisone to do on this location and then we will see. Was supposed to work at least a day this weekend but my boss said it seems like she won't need me to. So I can rest before my wisdom tooth removal on 4th. Yay.
How about you? How are you doing? Sorry to make you read this novel, hope it is not too overwhelming 😅
Hey, Cat :)
@jesusredeemedme2425 hey there, how are you?
Im good! Im finally back ;)
How have YOU been??? <3
@jesusredeemedme2425 I haven't been on cups much lately. But overall, I would rate it as a solid meh. Being in the normal of going to work and having days off, trying to focus on things that make me happy. January was nice, but I'm so happy February is over. It was not good at all OCD-wise for me. Hoping to get some rest in march now. How about you?
Same! Meh and OCD gone haywire…
@jesusredeemedme2425 i can feel that 😅 I´m just hanging on by a thread to get this difficult time over with and then i´m not picking up another shift for a good 5 days. I just want to rot in bed 😅
What exactly is going on? Fill me in <3
What are you doing to take care of yourself lately? (Lol I sound like one of those inspo posts) XD
Can you deal with not having that extra money? Is not working hard?
@jesusredeemedme2425 haha, nothing like a you can do it post thread (i´m myself guilty of a few) 🤣
basically very very bad february. Had my ocd constantly triggered. (TW: accidental wrist injury, 112 call, skip paragraph if it´s something that could trigger you) Right on the first, i was bagging a customer´s purchase when the paper bag scratched my wrist, but in line with my vein in the long way, not just across it. Luckily it didn´t get to the vein itself, and it was more of a surface scratch with a bit of very tiny tiny bleeding in the depth of it, but it was enough to make me anxious. I decided to finish my custoers and then get my collegue´s help to tape it down but as i was checking the people out, i suddenly got extremely dizzy, nauseous and couldn´t catch an item i was trying to scan. My entire vision got grainy and dark and i just thought i will faint. The customer and my collegue were worried, and asked if they should call 112 for me. I felt like passing out, with my entire hands and belly going numb, so i consented to the call, thinking there must be something seriously wrong with the wrist, even if it is not bleeding. The operator listened to the situation and told us i´m just in shock since the scratch was on such a bad place and to just breath. I was having a full blown panic by now since i literally couldn´t see a thing, despite having my eyes open, but they made me breath and sit down so i don´t faint and breath it over. So turns out i just went into a shock. Yay. Definitely embarassing. But my collegue was sweet and offered to let me go home if i need to, what i rejected, because if a trained medical professional said i´m completely fine and just need to chill out, then all is okay. It was also much safer for me to stay at work, in the sight of my collegue, who could immediately act if something is actually wrong, and would be much much more likely to receive help then if i passed out in a bus or on the street. I also knew that going home will only make me sit at home and panic, so only requested to sit for a while until i can exist and then resume working. Definitely not my proudest moment, but at least i got a story of "i thought i´m dying but i just needed a bandaid" and became some operator´s most dumb call. Yay
While this alone was not such a bad thing, like a week after it i ended up bumping my head in a dance studio´s roof-wall. That set me off into an absolute panic for a week and i haven´t recovered since. I went through everything from obsessing over my water intake, random stuff and panicking what if i have celiac on top of my histamine intolerance too. On the top of it, i have my neck stuck and keep waking up with my mouth and throat dry at night or early morning, what is just fueling my disregulation. I was also working a lot and when i wasn´t, i was having appointments like doctors or other program, so i never really got to chill out properly. To top it off, my boyfriend is currently dealing with caring for his mom who broke her arm and some insurance issues.
Work itself wouldn´t be a problem, as i work only a half time contract exactly due to my health, but had a lot of shifts right after each other, since i am a stand in when someone has a day off, is sick or can´t come in for some reason. Money isn´t a problem, as i live with my parents and they do not charge me anything, despite me offering to contribute. It took a year for them to stop trying to repay me even using my company issued gastro card for groceries, when i told them million times it is just foodstamps in card form that don´t even come from my sallary and are an employee benefit, so technically, i´m not even the one paying for the food, my employer is. Luckily, they finally grew to accept that i do not want to be repayed. So now i can buy groceries, stuff for myself (although getting them to not pay for medicine or dentist is still an ongoing fight). So that´s not a problem, more the lack of days when i don´t have to do anything and can rest is.
So all is just a big mess. I finally have a day off today, just to wake up to a message asking if i can take a shift today in the evening. I said no, and that i will be unavaible till next tuesday or thursday. I really hope to regulate because it´s horrible. Took some time to rest today, watch a random short drama that popped up on me on my *** feed and undusted some things a little. I´m trying to not push myself into anything at least for a few days, and hoping for the best
Wow, that sounds like a lot. I have GAD and I freak out over the little stuff. I currently have oral thrush from an inhaler, so I’ve been busy panicking about that.
You must be in a different country, because I’ve never heard of 112. Lol! It’s 911 here.
Whats a roof-wall?
Is his mom ok?
Why not just accept their offer and build up your savings? You’ll appreciate it one day when there’s an emergency…
What’s a gastro card? We don’t have those here.
I’m glad you focused on yourself today instead of saying yes to work. That’s really good self-care, and good practice saying no <3
Undusted?
@jesusredeemedme2425
I see you are not having a good time either. Anxiety over health sucks, and i hope your trush will pass soon 🌻 Do you also have it the way that the smaller the problem the bigger the panic? And absolutely worst panic over just slightly, theoreticaly possible under certain specific circumstances in 1 in a million things.
Yesss, I´m from Slovakia, and our general emergency service is 112, (although you can specifically call 150 for fire department, 158 for police or 155 for medical, but 112 is the best bet in most cases and let them figure it out for you)
Uhh. This wall that is tilted, attick style. That you don´t have a straight wall but is tilted, it is for areas that are directly under the roof. It´s these damn walls that maybe look good but will absolutely be causing you quite a few head injuries. I genuinely believe they should be illegal as it dangerous if you whack your head hard enough (although most cases you will be fine, just not happy with a sore spot but still, definitely not ocd friendly and not something people should risk if not needed)
Don´t worry, the fracture didn´t need an operation, just a cast and he is helping her around, so it will heal.
I do appreciate their offer a lot, but my stuff isn´t really expensive. My medicine needs to be replenished like once in 3 months, and even then it is like 30 euro, only for the allergic treatment, my inhaler is covered by my insurance, and other meds are more type of voltaren for neck pain or eyedrops, so nothing terrible. I wouldn´t be able to use up all the food card money alone, so there is no issue there either. And I decided to pay for my other things for two reasons. One is that my parents treat me like a child despite being 24, so it´s my way of saying a bit that i´m an adult now. And other is that I need to learn to manage income and outgoing expenses, and i would rather get into the habit while in a safe and controlled environment then having to figure it out later on my own. Since right now, if I manage my money wrong, it won´t be important or big sum, and my parents are there to help me and fix the mess i made. So i can figure it out and experiment with savings, investments and purchases of stuff i need or want. So it is a bit of an adulting thing too for me.
Gastro card is basically an employers food money for you, that you can not use for anything else. It is usually given in form of paper tickets, each worth a certain sum that you can buy food with or a special card that is accepted only in restaurants or grocery stores. While some employers opt for rather just giving money directly, most of them prefer food cards or tickets, as the law makes it mandatory for the employer to pay employees a certain sum for lunch.
Yessss, i removed dust from my stuff, because it collected a lot.
Thank you! I’m not a fan of the sore throat lol
I honestly just panic over everything, especially people’s perceived emotions, which are generally not true.
Where on earth is Slovakia?? Lol. As you can tell, I am very geographically challenged lol. I’m assuming it’s somewhat near Germany; I read a lot of books about the Holocaust, and I think I remember mention of Slovakia. (I hope that’s not offensive; I just read a lot of history and biographies about WWII.)
I wonder why they don’t have separate numbers here in America?
I’ve always thought those kinds of roofs were dumb. Also impractical; you can’t really use the lower section effectively.
Oh ok <3 I broke my ankle once. It was not fun. Lol (Although actually it kinda was lol)
Yeah, my meds are insanely cheap. Although it’s probably because I pay for the expensive insurance out of my paycheck lol! It doesn’t feel expensive because they take it out before I ever see it lol
Do you have to do your own taxes in Slovakia? That’s one thing I’ve never understood about America. Like why??? Lol
Gastro sounds like gastritis. Which I have. Lol
We have food stamps here too <3
Funny… we say dusted here. Lol! Yours makes more sense :)
@jesusredeemedme2425
Yeah, i can see why. Sore throat sucks 😢
Same haha, I panic over everything too, from thinking i have a heatstroke from a minute on the sun to water poisoning to what if i accidentally ate a houseplant i just passed by. 😂
We are between Austria, Czech republic, Poland, Ukraine and Hungary. Nahh, that´s okay. It is sadly a part of our history, and a very bitter one. We have been thrown under the bus by Europe who we considered to be our allies because Hitler said he only wants Czechoslovakia (we have been one state back then) and then he will have enough. We got sacrificed to be occupied in hopes for peace, just for him to invade Poland through our land anyway and plunge the world into ww2. Best is, Poland has been screaming their lungs out for years at that point that he is dangerous and Germany should immediately be attacked and disarmed or *** will hit the fan and noone listened. Always listen to Poland, they are incredibly based. And now it is all happening again with Ukraine and Russia, Putin claiming he wants Ukraine to not own nuclear weapons and not enter NATO to stay as neutral. Then he "only" wanted Krym. And now we are at a full blown war because the world did nothing but threw Ukraine under the bus. And now world leaders are playing around with cutting support to Ukraine, and simply let Russia take it to keep the peace. But Russia will not stop there, they want to restore the post ww2 eastern European block. People just skipped history class on how ww2 started and now would make the same mistakes if they could. If Ukraine falls, they will keep pushing to neighbouring countries. We are safe for now as NATO protects us, but they keep trying to bully Poland from time to time just to see if NATO stands behind protection or will throw the victim under the bus. So i believe it is extremely important to talk about history, even if someone won´t come out looking the best in it.
As for the emergency caller, we usually also just call 112 instead of bothering and let them sort us out 😂 But we do have an option to directly contact who we need (usually smaller, less complex and less urgent matters like let´s say discovering someone broke into your home while you were away and stole something is completely fair to call police directly, but for cases like immediate emergency 112 is the fastest and more urgent usually)
Yep, those roofs should be illegal 😂
Oh, wanna share what happened with your ankle?
Same, we do have to pay health insurance, but it sucks less when we don´t see it 😂
As for taxes, it depends on your type of employment. If you are a normal full time or lower hours contract employee, your workplace will usually do taxes for you unless you say you will do them yourself (usually chosen by people who have multiple sources of income). If you have a student job type or are an entrepreneur, you do the taxes yourself. So it is heavily depending on your contract type and work conditions.
Oh... So sorry to hear about your stomach problems. I have histamine intolerance, but it can´t even come close to the amount of problems and pain you must be in with your condition. Hope you will get well soon 🌻
yesss, these cards work in a similar way that you can only use it for food, but here they are mandated benefit from an employer for everyone who works there as sort of lunch compensation since you have to bring or buy lunch and they are intended to be a sort of employer compensation for that. So it is not a thing of social support here, but a mandatory work benefit that is not deducted from your wage.
My doctor just emailed me and told me I’m supposed to be taking like 4 meds lol. I had no idea XD So we’ll see if that works lol
I’m sorry, how would you accidentally eat a houseplant????? XD
What disheartens me is how many of my younger coworkers don’t know about the Holocaust, or even read! It’s really sad how ignorant people are…
Am I allowed to talk about politics here? Lol. I’m never sure who doesn’t mind it, and who is fanatical on either end of the spectrum… lol. Some people get very angry…
Yeah, 112 sounds easiest lol! Especially if you’re in a situation and panicking..
Yeah, those roofs are weird lol
I was riding a scooter… and the other kids’ mom didn’t bother to mention, “Hey, it’s broken btw”. Sigh. I walked on my ankle for a week (with excruciating pain) before finding out it was broken.
Why does the concept of “doing taxes” even exist lol
What’s histamine intolerance?
Nah, I just have to avoid spicy food and such. It’s manageable and not too bad :)
That’s cool! Free food basically lol
Btw, what’s the meaning behind your username? <3
@jesusredeemedme2425
Oh wow, that´s quite a way to find out haha. Hope they will help you feel better 😊
How would i eat a houseplant? Well. I passed by it. A small leaf gets caught on my lips (despite if it actually touched my face i would absolutely know and have a meltdown). I won´t notice and proceed to eat or drink, swallowing it with it 😂 My OCD is really creative when it comes to coming up with the wildest scenarios 😂
Yes, history should absolutely be talked about so we can learn from it, honor the victims and not repeat the mistakes that were made in the past. Or at least can recognise them and take steps when we notice them happening.
I usually avoid talking about politics too, but I am always up to trash Russia 😂 As for the other believes, I am center, leaning conservative. So well. I will disagree with all the sides of the compass for some of their opinions and usually just prefer to find common ground outside of politics to avoid drama. I feel like people nowadays forgot how to talk about anything other then politics and social problems, what is not good. It is very unhealthy. No wonder we are all miserable when this is all we focus on. A lot of people also don´t get a chance to develop their own hobbies or personality since they are just so flooded with all the news and social stuff every single day since early age. And then they feel like they can not have a normal conversation with someone who has completely different believes because they make their politics their entire identity. So I prefer to usually explore other topics but i can find enjoyment in people who are open to rational debates and seek to understand even if their views are the exact opposite of mine. In general, i don´t really follow politics too much, but my boyfriend does, so he updates me a lot about stuff going on. Sometimes he is even knowing news from our country sooner then i do haha. (BTW if you ever wanna trashtalk our prime minister, i´m your person 🤣)
Wow, I´m so sorry you had such a painful scooter experience. Do you still experience the effect of it?
Histamine intolerance is basically allergy to nothing and everything, as it is a problem with a devouring enzime, i think DAO? But basically your body can´t break down histamine properly and it makes you feel bad. It can present itself in a very broad way, from acne through migraines to rashes, but most common symptoms are devouring issues. To everyone individually, someone may experience nausea, vomiting, belly ache, various bathroom issues, etc. I´m personally nauseous, but had it found in my blood test after i had a huge full body allergic reaction that didn´t go away and kept escalating so i ended up in ER.
Histamine is in a lot of foods, and it is basically also individual what you can and can´t eat. In general, we don´t do well with alcohol and processed foods, shouldn´t reheat some things and so on. But there are some spreadsheets online where you can find what foods have high, mid, low and no histamine or have some liberators and then well. You just need to trial-error since you will most likely be able to eat some stuff that others can´t while not eat stuff others can. Also, you will absolutely have a "if the constallation of stars is right" category, with foods you can eat sometimes for a while and then no, just to eat them again later. And you have no idea why. So not fun sadly. It is also worse with stress, and people keep asking if it is not just in your head and constantly comment on your picky and problematic eating. That´s genuinely worse then the nausea
Glad your stomach is managable. Belly problems are the worst.
Yessss!!! Exactly! Free food is the entire point. We are like little house pets that have to get a bowl for being there 😊
My username is nothing special tbh. I think i made the profile when i was thinking about leaving uni, and didn´t know if i should. I love cats. And was sad lol
I am SO sorry… I never saw this. Please remind me to respond later <3
@jesusredeemedme2425 reminding
I freak out a bit if I’m out walking and brush against a plant. Like, idk what poison ivy or whatever looks like lol
I hope I don’t start a fight by saying this, but I see some parallels between the Holocaust and our current political events here… (idk if I mentioned that before. I’ve been gone from this chat so long. My apologies…)
Where are you from again? Lol. Because you mentioned trashing Russia lol
What bugs me is how many people (especially guys) here that brag about not picking up a book since high school. Like… a lack of reading is a sign of coolness or something.
What’s even worse is when you know people who either know little about, or have never even heard of, world events, such as 9/11 or the Holocaust. Yes, I know people like that…
Oh, not at all. Well actually… Yes. My foot clicks every so often, because of the injury. But not painfully. Just audibly. Lol
Devouring enzyme? Like a digestive enzyme?
Liberators?
I won’t judge your eating issues <3
Do I get a bowl of free food?? Hehe
Why were you going to leave uni? And why were you sad? And why 13 cats??? Hehe
@jesusredeemedme2425
Fair enough 😄 I hate touching any plants in general and am panicking if they are anywhere within 2m from me, my food and my cup.
I´m curious what you see them in, feel free to let me know. If we get overwhelmed or have too different views to deal with right now, we can just press pause on that topic and maybe retry later when we feel more ready to discuss it.
I´m from Slovakia, and our current government has it´s head so far up Russia´s a** that we didn´t even think it is possible. Our prime minister is an old eastern block time communist, everyone knows it, everyone hates him and yet he won somehow. My boyfriend is polish, and Poland has beef with Russia too. So we are very done with them.
Books are cool. Not reading and not taking steps to upgrade your knowledge or skills at least in one area is a big problem. I can see why it bothers you.
Well, i can vouch for a lot of people not seeing what Putin is doing is basically how WW2 started, so i´m absolutely a believer in the bottomless pit of human stupidity 😅
Good there are no more consequences to your injury other then the sound.
Yesss. And liberators are basically foods that maybe don´t have high histamine by themselves, but can influence your body´s ability to deal with the histamine you already have in your system in some way. Like supporting histamine release or something and therefore you can feel bad from that food even if the histamine itself is not the main issue by content.
Of course, we currently have some oven baked chicken on garlic and some potatoes. Is that okay for you?
My uni was not good. I was studying scenography and it was extreme. We had entire day at school, then came home and had to do a lot more work on our projects.
For practical lessons, we had:
- painting
- graphics design
- historical costume (sewing a historical clothing replica)
- set and costume design for a selected play (All from the first reading to making an entire documentation and a 3D small scale model)
- technical construction
- sculpture (1st year) /3D pc modelling (2nd year)
They expected us to have a significant progress on all of these, week by week. Most of those things we had 0 previous information on and on top of that, we were often stucked by the teacher on a task and had to redo it repeatedly just to struggle with one for the entire semester and then a few days before the practical presentation having to rush all rest just to get a bad grade on it.
Graphics design was the worst. The teacher drove me nuts. We were supposed to make a business card. I did. He criticized my colour and style choice, saying the yellow looks like Slovnaft (a car fuel company that is popular here) and that whyyyy did i use dots. Then he told me to not be stuck on the traditional size and experiment with different shapes and forms. So on next lesson, I brought him a selection of business cards in formats of squares and circles and all kind of shapes THAT HE SUGGESTED ME TO DO. And he looked at it and told me that "you know people will have these in a business card case and they need to fit right? So it´s better to use a traditional size." And i just stared at him. And redid it again. I didn´t like the lesson and he knew it, but i was the only one of the class who made an effort to present him with work continuosly and consult. Some of my classmates did their work literally a day or two before presentation day. They all got better grade then i did. So safe to say i was just like
I was also dealing with some hard ptsd during my first year, but luckily the teachers were nice about it and let me work through it. I did the best i could and by the end of the year i was able to function properly. But it was not enough. I tried my best in the subjects but was never good enough. And by the time the teachers started to see me as promissing, i was simply done. Had a nervous breakdown so bad i couldn´t finish my tasks despite being almost done, refusing all later times and quit. I even had a few projects with my classmate we tried our best in, only for it to fall through and ending up as a very discouraging experience. They once made more of us fail the practicals that were caused by the teachers getting us stuck on tasks. I just had no words by the end of the second year. And that´s only the practical stuff.
We had a lot of theory too with very demanding teachers. Well, the part of them being demanding wasn´t the problem as much as them being a**holes was. Our art history and clothing history teachers were very good in knowledge, but insufferable people. So just overall a lot of not fun stuff that was not worth the struggle. I feel like i didn´t really learn much new what i didn´t know before, and what i did was basically self learning, and i don´t need someone to stand over me for that. It gave me a general direction ideas on where can i develop my skills and now all is up to me if i want to learn or not.
So genuinely. Quitting was one of the best choices i ever made. And as much as some tasks were nice, i feel happy to be gone. I chose a part time job that doesn´t follow me home and it is great. I´m still not fully recovered from that huge burnout and nervous breakdown but i´m doing much better now.
Remind me to respond to this later… it’s late lol
@jesusredeemedme2425 meow meow
Why am I so lame at responding??? I’m sorry :(
@jesusredeemedme2425 nooo, it's okay, you just told me to remind you, so I did and then thought maybe you didn't get a notification so did it again, but take your time
I just never have the bandwidth for stuff lately lol
@jesusredeemedme2425 it's okay, take the time you need
I forgot to respond again -_-
@jesusredeemedme2425 it's okay, you will get there
I was abused today… Im not doing well rn :’(
@jesusredeemedme2425 wanna tell me more?
I’m kinda over it already tbh lol. Did you see my post?
The ER visit, however, kinda destroyed me.
@jesusredeemedme2425 yes i saw it after, i´m sorry you had to go through it
Thanks <3
Tonight’s challenge: Knock out at least one “Needs Reply” post <3
Does anybody hear her?
@jesusredeemedme2425 oh, hear who?
Me.
@jesusredeemedme2425 of course we do. Even when it doesn´t always feel like that. I believe, in your case, the question is, if you hear yourself too 💛
Wym?
@jesusredeemedme2425 that it seems like you have a lot of bad feelings associated with yourself. Whether it is guilt, self hate or some other things. So what I'm saying is essentially you need some kindness and self compassion for yourself too and deserve the same love and care you give to us 🌻
I had a panic attack last night
@jesusredeemedme2425 i´m so sorry to hear that. Did things get overwhelming for you?
I had a migraine that felt different
@jesusredeemedme2425 oh, migraines are very bad
****TW****
They make me a bit nauseous, but not a lot. Nothing too bad, but uncomfortable…
@jesusredeemedme2425 i Can see why. Nausea and headache are the worst
Right????
And how’s Cat lately? <3
@jesusredeemedme2425 not too well. I just learnt some very bad news that disappointed me greatly. I don't think I'm allowed to talk about it yet, but you will know when it happens.
It's also incredibly hot here, barely dragging myself around and my allergy season is going strong.
I'm finishing up a few things project wise, so hoping to clean my plate now. Otherwise, feeling extremely behind on my other plans since I got side quested.
I’m so sorry… I’m here for you through it all <3
Yeah, it’s hot here too, and allergies have been high at work. Luckily that’s calming down now :)
What kind of projects?
What side quests?
*hugs*
@jesusredeemedme2425 one is basically creating a visual system for one of my work locations for faster and more efficient customer check out
The other is related to my role as the peer appreciation form designer and the overall role in the team.
Then the beta reading has a few chapters left to write feedback on
And having millions of creative projects started I want to work on like knitting, embroidery etc
Sounds like a lot of work…
@jesusredeemedme2425 yep. I'm certainly not bored
There’s a plus lol
Here. A lovely place, very kind locals. Much better than Italy. And the beaches are rocky, no pesky sand. They yeeted me out of the bus at like 6am. It's 6:35 accommodation is possible from like 2 in the afternoon (booking says check in from 11 but I'm not having my hopes up). I hate the first day hard.
Do you live in Italy?
What’s accommodation?
@jesusredeemedme2425 nope, Slovakia. But been to Italy once. Accomodation is basically hotel
Why would the check in time change?
@jesusredeemedme2425 they ocassionally let people in sooner if they are done cleaning faster or have to wait a little longer if they are not done on time
Ohhh
Heyyyyy how’s life??? <3
@jesusredeemedme2425 hiiiiii 😊 awesome, been at work for 5 days this week, so runned myself out a little. It also helped me take the silent challenge easier 😁
But what it did not help with was the trip I'm taking today. I was stuck in the car for an hour and my body does not appreciate the sitting. Still one more hour to go but at least we took a break now on the gas station.
Also, I'm having a runny nose again for some reason and am panicking a little because I'm travelling to meet my bf on 18th and don't want to be sick, but I can also have some grass allergy flare up. So hoping for the best
How about you? 😊
Fun lol
How goes the challenge?
How was the trip?
Mask? It might help a bit <3
Having a hard night :(
@jesusredeemedme2425 pretty good, I keep the challenge thread updated. First two days were hard, 3-4 was too tired and busy to be actually hard to manage. We will see how today goes.
The trip is nice, still here. I'm coming home on Wednesday or Thursday, we will see, based on how I feel since I have work on Friday and Saturday and a family baking planned on Sunday with my cousin, and other cousins wife for a girls time 😊
Sadly it doesn't help, it is actually one of the reasons my allergy turned into asthma. So it's better for me to just stick it out. But I'm on Oralair off season (an allergic treatment pill that you take every morning that contains the grass allergens in small doses to make your body understand it is nothing to go bonkers over) and it helped a lot. Went from having hard asthma and inflammation in my upper respiratory system to a little bit of runny nose and a mild out of breath at the worst times. So it's much much better.
Oh, I see. Wanna tell me more?
I’m sorry I took so long to respond. Now I have the flu and a fever and I can’t think :(
@jesusredeemedme2425 ohhhhh. Get well soon
I’m sorry I’ve been a bad friend
@jesusredeemedme2425 you are not a bad friend, come on. You are busy with life and dealing with your things. Nothing wrong with that
I took 15 days to respond to you.
@jesusredeemedme2425 I mean. There is nothing wrong with that. There is no question of life and death here, just a casual chat. You will respond when you feel like it. And I will find it then, simply picking up where we left it. Nothing actually bad is happening. Also it would be extremely unfair to push a quick response on a mental health platform where we are both members. Take all the time you need. I will find the reply when you get back to me
Good point
@jesusredeemedme2425 so well. Take your time. I'm not sweating it. Especially since we sometimes talk on like 3 other threads parallely. So really. Don't sweat it. You will reply when you have the mood, energy or mental capacity to do so and I will find it and continue like nothing happened. Your mental wellbeing comes first, this site should not feel like an obligation ❤️
True… I just feel like a bad person. I’ve been neglecting several penpal chats…
@jesusredeemedme2425 you really don't need to. You do a lot for the platform and you are one of its most cherished members. It's a lot of hard work. You are a human, just like all of us. You have a limited energy and capacity and you are doing the best you can at the moment, as you try to find the right balance that works for you the best. There is nothing wrong with that. And people who do not understand that you can't make your life revolve around someone else when your own isn't in order are not really ones you should keep close. You are doing the best you can and that's perfectly enough