For two broken hearts to try and mend

Ooo my heart breaks for u. Because your friendship ended too. That's hard

Sighhhhhhh

So now "M" is asking what he's allowed to do when he sees me? I'm like nada lol 🤣

Then he assures me that he got the gift because he wanted to, not because he's expecting anything in return

So now I'm like should I go? But then again, why'd u ask me what you're allowed to do if your intention isn't to try to do something???

There will be no smooching of any kind 🤐

My lips belong to someone else

Stay strong and try not to give any signs that will lead him on. Keep spinning your ring when or if you go and meet “M” and let him see that you cherish what you have.

that’s my biggest issue, that I lost my best friend and confidant. 

There’s “S” but things are different between us and I really don’t open up to her. I don’t see her still reaching out once I am gone. Our boss retired June 2024 and I still reach out to her but she tells me that “S” has not and they worked together for 40 years.

I'll try to be strong. But good gravy he makes me weak 😩

I wish he didn't get me anything

At the same time ik I'll cherish it deeply because it's from him 🥹

As far as "S" goes maybe it'll help ease the pain a lil because of the type of relationship 🤷🏾‍♀️

Less of a chance to fall for her like you did with "C"

Maybe a nice chance to rekindle with your wife

Just try not to melt 🫠 in front of him, If/when you decide to go meet him.

I understand, if I had anything from C I'd cherish it as well.

Last Sept, C gave me advice that brought my wife and I closer together than we'd been in a couple of decades and I'll always be grateful to her for that. I did let her know that as well.

S and I have a relationship full of coincidences. I guess it's different between us maybe because I know she is in a stable relationship with her husband??

She is only a few months older than I, we were born the same year. Our kids are around the same age, her grandkids are around the same age as mine.

Back when I was young 12 to 15, I hung with a childhood buddy of mine about 15 miles outside of town. I met people there that S also knew. She at the same time hung out around there as well, we could have bumped into each other back then but neither of us remember. 

I lived closer to downtown and moved to the burbs. The street I live on is the same street where S's ex in law's live. I knew her mother in law and a couple of her brother in law's.

Ooo wow what a small world. It's crazy how life's like that.

What advice did she give if u don't mind sharing?

Also I posed my situation in a chat as a question if I should meet up with him. Everyone basically said it's a trap I shouldn't go pick up the gift. He's love bombing. I think they're right.

I definitely would melt in front of him. He knows it too 😩

When I opened up to C , I also told her I was lonely. She told me that I should sit down and talk it out with my wife, and she bet that my wife was also lonely. (I think from personal experience)

Our problem is that when ever we talked our daughter thinks we are arguing and starts banging on her desk or walls telling us to stop.

We could never get the talk in at home. So we had my lil sis come over and sit with her.

We went for good 2 hour walk and talked about how we felt and both of us got emotional and she is always surprised when I start tearing up on her. We were both feeling lonely.

We gave up I. G., I haven't been on in just over a year and my wife just started back on but I told her I don't want her on it while we are together. We use to spend a better part of a day on there, aimlessly scrolling through pictures and videos.

Chat room, huh I can't remember the last time I was in one. Sounds like the room had some decent people in it and gave sound advice.

Wow, really sounds like you guys made a lot of progress. I c y you both felt a bit lonely before. You weren't really able to freely express yourselves to each other. I'm glad you were able to do so ð¥¹

Yeah, I check the participant list. I've gotten a pretty good feel of the ppl that aren't judgy & that I'm comfy with. When I see them in I feel more free to talk about what I need to talk about. Rooms of 5 or less people for me is usually the sweet spot.

Anywho I'm off to bed now with much to think about. Hopefully, tomorrow things will become a bit clearer for me.

Hope you get a good night's rest

Good morning,

I was in a great sleep when my daughter texted to say she was out front with the little one.

Usually I am awake well before 6AM ☺️

Hope you also had a great sleep and not fret too much?

Work from home day and I will have to watch the little one for a bit while my wife take about daughter to the dentist.

Try to enjoy your day 

Aww. I think your lil ones will be your post retirement buddies 😊

Hope u guys have fun today & u can occupy your mind to help you not feel so anxious today

I slept ok. I was thinking a lot. Someone said something encouraging to me yesterday, that what I'm dealing with currently is a relapse with "M" but that I am being strong by talking about it with others.

Cups has been helpful with that I must say. Before cups I would just go at it alone. No one to bounce thoughts off of especially when ik that my thinking needs to be readjusted.

It also helps me not feel so alone. Before I would've spent every waking moment talking to him. Now, I have ppl I can talk to when I need emotional comfort. It makes me feel more empowered I guess.

I'm a little stronger 💪🏾 but still not strong lol 😆