TK Reboot
A chat between two platonic friends from across the interwebs.
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Are you ever ashamed of me?
Why would I ever be ashamed of you?
Because I’m gross and have a food addiction
No, I'm proud of you for trying and for being who you are
I feel bloated all the time.
I often do too... Trying to workout more again. I just need to be sleeping enough to have workout energy. Do you get enough sleep?
What’s sleep?
Maybe that's our biggest problem 😅
But sleep interrupts fun stuff! Like Iron Chef ;)
Lol, true... I don't get much downtime in the evenings... Between walking the dog, workouts, dinner, whatever else happens. It's even hard to make time for the guineas sometimes.
Cut some stuff out?
Well, I can't really cut that stuff out too often. It's important... I just seriously need more time. 😅. I can get through some of it faster if I'm not too tired... That just requires being well rested to begin with
How do you feel about starting our Bible reading again? <3
I just read Deuteronomy 1!
For sure. So, what did you think about that chapter?
It was basically a recap by Moses of what had happened before lol. There’s more coming up lol
True. Very much a thing of we're so close, but if you turn away now it could be another 40 years in the desert...
I just read chapter 2 :)
This one reminds me of teaching my dog "leave it". They're being rewarded with an entire land to rampage and overthrow by not messing with the first one.
Exactly. People get the lands God gives them, they don’t get to steal other people’s land. That’s just rude. Hehe
Lol, true... but, God gave them other people's land also. Right? They were guaranteed that land if they took it, so they slaughtered everyone, including the women and children. 😅
It’s more like… he gave them a chance to repent. Like, decades. Centuries. They didn’t. They got their punishment.
Sure, I guess, but even the children had to be slaughtered? That's like saying that no children today deserve a chance to live or exist because too many people (doesn't even have to be their parents and ancestors) have followed false prophets and lived sinful lives. I mean, I realize that isn't exactly the idea of what's biblically supposed to happen in today's age... I'm just saying as a comparison. And I wouldn't have done it. I don't care how many years I'd been wandering, I wouldn't unalive a child, no matter what deity told me to, or what milky honeyish land I was promised. (I hope youre taking this as a discussion point, and not arguing with your religion... It's probably hard to tell sometimes coming from me.) 😅
Lol I’m used to you ;)
No, I like the discussions <3
I think it’s more along the lines of, these kids are getting trained up the exact same way as the adults, so they are equally depraved and sinful. So they were all guilty.
Lol, I'm glad, and I do too. 😊
So, why would they be equally depraved and sinful? That's like when I was 4... I quoted something I heard in a movie that had a cuss word, and my dad just flew into a rage and beat me until I couldn't sit. (Don't... Worry, that didn't happen but once) But the point is, I didn't even know what the word meant, or that it was a cuss word. So was I equally depraved and sinful as the character in the movie was? Or would I even have been wrong to think that his response was correct? I was just a kid. Now, if I had kids, and I took my dad's lesson to heart and beat them willy nilly for even things that could be misunderstandings, then I would be culpable... But I also would have had all the time growing into adulthood to realize that abuse is wrong.
I mean, what I'm getting at, is that they can't be taken as hypothetical kids that were just like the adults, because kids rarely act just like their parents. And even if they were, then God made them to be as they are. So, what purpose could these sinful people have ever served beyond just being fodder to make God's people more apt to cruelty and more able to justify it?
Is it bad that I’m so used to hearing about abuse that it doesn’t even faze me like it should?
I’m sorry he beat you :( Was he always abusive?
I don’t have answers. I wish I had all the answers…
That actually makes sense... I feel detached from being affected too to some extent.
Actually, that was the only time I remember being abused by him on any physical level... Emotional abuse and neglect, however? That was pretty constant. Especially between the ages of like... 11-21.
And it's ok to not have all the answers. I started looking at the Bible the way I do when I was still really young, like 19 maybe. It became harder to justify my belief in God. A lot of people go down that hard road, and keep faith while questioning, and I respect that. Most of what I felt about it back then was fairly immature, but I did take one thing I heard to heart... Basically, that you can learn from the man who doesn't have all the answers, but never trust the one who does. Instead of starting an endless search for answers with my questioning, my intention was to just keep coming to better questions. I'd spent too much time listening to authority when it specifically came to religion, and I didn't feel good about that.
It wasn't until fairly recently that I realized some extensions to that... Like, that sometimes I need to apply my questioning... And that a lot of beauty and mystery can be found in that search, and maybe most importantly of all, that I've come all this way to find that I'm not really different from the good Christian I used to strive to be, or most good Christians in general. I may feel that way more things are subjective and gray, but I still try to serve what's actually good, and I feel like I hold a lot of the same values, just from a different standpoint, and hopefully one with worthy insight. Ultimately though, I don't have the answers either, and it's refreshing when anyone can admit that.
It keeps you alive. It just does, yk? At least with me. Keeps me from panic attacks at least. I have to consciously detach myself sometimes. Did that today… To keep going without panicking.
Same. Idk what really being loved by a man means. Starting with my dad and stepdad.
I question things too… But I know that God will give me the answers I need in time. If nothing else, He will reassure me that I’m doing the right thing. Idk if that makes sense. I’m tired...
That’s why I like doing the Professor Grant Horner’s Bible reading plan. Look it up. Referencing and cross referencing without doing it intentionally.
I guess so. I used to feel way too affected. That definitely wasn't good for me.
I hope that you get to know that kind of love someday.
It does make sense. I actually feel similarly. Answers might begin to come together after this life, and I know that there is some kind of good force that tries to guide me.
That's kind of a cool reading plan .. kinda wish I'd known about it before reading all of it.
I just read Psalm 38
Read it too. Not really sure what to say about that one. It's typical David
It’s my life.
Whatcha mean?
I dunno, he sounds like his physical problems are causing him severe emotional anguish. I don't blame him on that one.
I have both
Same. Ugh, it's just gonna get worse with age too 😭
Don’t remind me lol
I'm reading a book about a woman who was saved from being a Satanist. I've learned two things... Demons can't read minds. And Satan is not omnipresent like Jesus.
There's a lot to unpack there. What's the book called? And what kind of Satanism?
And then... What did it say to convince you of that?
“He Came to Set the Captives Free”.
There’s more than one kind?
She was demon possessed. She controlled demons, and was controlled BY demons. Satan himself manifested and visited some of the ceremonies she attended. She learned from experience that these things were true.
Ah, I see. Um, sounds pretty hardcore. 😂 Curious about that now.
Yes there's different kinds... There's Theistic, which can either be irresponsible rituals and worship (like in that book), or more of a philosophical religious belief about Satan actually being the good guy.
Or there's Laveyan... That's the biggest one, and that's just basically the embracing of individualism and indulgence. I don't really jive with it because it seems really undisciplined, but they honestly have tenets that are ethical instead of moral, but I think that they make a lot more sense than the 10 commandments. But the main reason it's called "Satanism" is because it's meant to stick it to hypocritical Christians who claim to be so good and moral but really just show up to church on Sundays without really examining their faith or the ethics of their actions. I hope I'm explaining that remotely right.
Most Satanists are decent people. The Church of Satan has done more for charity and helping the unfortunate than probably most Christian churches combined.
I'm sure there's a lot of other kinds too. Anyway, point is that it's only as evil or devil-worshippy as the individual practicioner wants to make it. Mostly it's just a way of life for people who think differently, and has little/nothing to actually do with Satan himself.
I’m mostly just curious how you know all this. :P
Curious about what?
Please tell me how theistic and Satanism go together in the same sentence. Lol
Anton LaVey. I’ve done my research too. ;) (Whether I capitalized it right is another matter. Lol)
Yeahhhh this version is WAY more hardcore and serious than you think. You really should read the book. It’s INTENSE.
Lol, I mostly just took an interest and started looking things up. Though I have known a few Satanists, and had one as a roommate. He still owes me like $2000 and a big bottle of Kraken spiced rum... But anyhow, he's the one who taught me about LaVey and most of what I told you.
Anyway, I was curious about the book. I might look into it a little. My aunt used to tell me stories that were similar, about how she used to worship Satan and how all this evil stuff started happening. I think she just wanted to believe stuff was happening though... It's the one subject that I can't believe her on though, because she'd want to believe other stuff was signs from God, and they totally weren't.
Theistic and Satanism... That'd be for the people who believe that Satan is actually real, and they worship him as a deity. I don't get why anyone wants to do that. In my aunt's case it was just like... an immature way of fitting in and being subversive. Like, maybe I could understand if they didn't believe he was actually evil... But then I just have different hang-ups with it.
I have such a migraine…
That's no bueno... Doing any better?
Sorry I never came back :(
It’s on again off again. I feel a tiny bit rn, but not enough to speak of.
I feel… lonely. And not really appreciated.
All good. 😊
Oof, you might want to bring it up to your doctor at some point. They can help. I'm pretty sure you don't wanna have those all the time.
Why lonely and unappreciated? You've had to deal with a lot of fake people this year.
I have. Might be my diet or stress.
Been giving out my Christmas cards… I just feel under-appreciated. Maybe my brain is just broken, idk.
Well, that narrows it down from other or worse things at least.
Are people not liking them? Your brain isn't broken, it's just... You definitely deserve more appreciation than you get
My tummy is messing with me lately. I wonder why… It’s not like I have an eating disorder or anything. rolls eyes at myself
Dude, mine too. And I've even been doing 50% better on my diet the past few days. I think this is the first day I've ever farted and have had people in the office notice. 😂
Lol why???
I have no idea. My stomach was an ALL day nightmare yesterday. Today seems to be better so far
Same kinda. Prolly need to poop more.
Yep. If you ask the guinea girls, they'll suggest pooping several times an hour. 😂 Finally cleaned their cage again...
I must be a guinea pig XD
How bad was it???
It was bad, Nessa was a little put off. 😅
Wym?
I told them I'd come clean their cage the next day. She was hiding and wasn't really engaging with me during YouTube time, so I called her, and asked her if she was mad at me. She just sorta started looking all around her, poking stuff with her nose. I was like, "okay, I get it, I won't put it off anymore."
Does she understand English??
Like... Intimidatingly well. Sometimes I think she understands English better than Rosie, Sweets, and Akira combined. She's also really expressive with showing excitement, affection, or gassiness. Of course, they know a bit of Spanish too, because I say sweet things to them in Spanish. I call them "querida" (dear) or "princesa" (princess). I also tell them "buenas noches" at night, and "buen provecho" when I feed them. (It's basically "bon appetit")
Gassiness?????
Lol, not gassiness... That was supposed to be sassyness. 😫
I like the first one betterrrrr XD
They aren't that capable of being gassy. 😜 But Rosie has the gassiness and sassyness
Lol do tell XD
Rosie farted 9 times in a row while she was begging for my cornbread today
Bahahahaha XD
The fact that you COUNTED is… interesting XD
Lol, always do. I want to know how many hits in the combo. 😂
Bahahahaha like Fruit Ninja XD
Where’d you go lol
I got no alerts for messages here, checking last minute. It was a busy weekend, but really nice. I don't wanna go back to work tomorrow... 😫
Lame alerts. Lol
What happened this weekend? <3
Yeahhhh but work provides money. Lol
This weekend, looked at Christmas lights, had a dinner with friends at a good Mexican place, shopped around, trying to figure out a couple of Christmas presents. Hung out with another friend. Had to work on the weekend too. What have you been up to?
Doing the Cinematic Quest Challenge. Finding some crazy stuff lol
Heh, that's cool. I took a peek, and didn't recognize anything when I did
Wym?
In the movies you found with it. Maybe I'll do the challenge at some point
Probably not. ;)
Maaaybe
I feel yucky :(
Aww, for why?
I slept in, and now my body hates me… Also I have a headache. Again.
Dang... Allergies?
Just… Kiara.
I want you to be able to feel lots better. Maybe more rest?
More rest seems to be making me feel worse.
I dunno what to suggest... :/
Rest is rare but good. :)
I am so lonely rn…
hugs why so lonely? I'm here for you
I lost my listener today. Go read my post
I did read it.. I'm so sorry... Yeah, connection like that can't really be replaced by just anyone with good intentions. What happened anyway?
Self care break. Possibly permanent.
Oh man. So you don't know what to expect, but they're probably just out? Losing a good listener is really hard. I got transferred from the one therapist that was really helping me at one point... Luckily, the next guy was at least pretty cool, if not really what I needed.
Are you getting therapy here, or elsewhere?
None right now. I've never spent muuuuch time getting therapy here. Just a couple of times
Meow?
Woof!
Sorry, been neglecting my posts…
S'all good. It just felt quiet and I wanted to check on ya. 😊
I didn’t even notice I hadn’t responded. I must have accidentally deleted the notification… Sorry!
No worries! My notifications stopped showing up as normal, so I just pop in occasionally now
You don’t tag me, so it doesn’t tell me when you respond lol, just when you like my posts.
I tag you in posts. 😅 Also, I try to like your comments as I reply to them. Juuuust in case. I pretty much always like your comments anyway though.
Aww. Hehe
