Chat with @wisteria28 and @FaithfulScout
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@wisteria28
Hi again!
I forget if I had mentioned this to you before ... after I meet someone, my preference is to use my real name, Tom. (Ofc l wouldn't have any expectation for anyone to do the same 🙂).
So … how am I doing? It’s very kind of you to ask. I am doing very well even though I had a shock recently, and I am facing some small (but new) challenges in the coming weeks.
I will leave the story here until later (once we both can find this thread and access it okay).
Thanks in advance for trying this with me ☺️
Hello tom thank you for creating this thread i m pleased you want to talk with me i m sorry for the shock you went through i hope it gets well for you and that you will be well i really appreciate you always responding to my threads your words have been very comforting to me this community never fails to help me when i m at my lowest and reminds me that living is worth it i want to keep meeting nice people as i grow up thanks a million
Hi … @wisteria28
I am glad this community has helped so much. When I came to this site a little over a month ago, I was hoping to find something different … and it has definitely surpassed my expectations.
Ok here’s the continuation …
At the beginning of 2024 I was diagnosed with cancer, following a back injury. Miraculously, I have been taking a single medication, Tagrisso (or osimertinib), which has held back the cancer. However, last month an MRI showed a tumor had grown in my brain, and I needed surgery.
It was a success, and I am in a semi-process of recovery. Tomorrow I will begin a mapping procedure that will set me up for a 5-day course of radiation therapy to clean up any microscopic cells remaining.
I hope this wasn’t too much to take in. I really appreciate you asking me how I am doing. It is so very kind and compassionate of you. Even though I have a great support network in real life, it has been a true blessing to have found a few friends here at 7Cups who I can really share myself with.
Again, thank you for making space for our conversation!
I’ll talk to you soon (heading out to other appointments for the rest of the day)!
I m so sorry you went through that i can't imagine how hard it is to go through that you are a very brave person tom i wish you a safe and successful recovery i should be the one to thank you i m not the most sociable person and i find it hard to approach people and even when i do i can't really open up to others but meeting nice people like you here had been a blessing i m grateful for, i thank you for taking the time to speak to me i wish you are doing well good luck with your appointments 🤍🤍🤍
@wisteria28
I’m not the most sociable person either.
In fact, I am very much an introvert. Over the years I have learned there are people I am supposed to meet, there are people I am supposed to “walk by” … and as I was writing this, I was going to say, “there are people I am supposed to avoid”—but upon reflection, that is not true.
As a kid, I always wanted to be with the popular crowd, but I was too shy and therefore stayed very isolated. When I was teenager I did a sport, and that exposed me to a few more people, but still I was very shy: I didn’t speak out in class, I didn’t go to parties, and I was too scared to try to have a girlfriend.
Eventually, I was taught how to value myself and how to appreciate the person inside me. I learned about spirituality and how to value my mental health just as much as I value my physical health. And from there, all the “pieces”, like in a jigsaw puzzle, started to come together.
You may not be a sociable person … But who knows? Maybe you are not supposed to be a sociable person.
I suppose that's true I don't think I m cut out to be a sociable person but still i do think i should try to be more brave because in this way i may meet precious friends and make valuable connections with others i honestly didn't take you for an introvert you seem so wise and friendly since you know your way with words speaking to someone who knows so much and have had the experience in life is comforting it gives me hope for the future i hope i can grow up to be someone so positive and brave .I hope you have been doing well recently do you feel better?
@wisteria28
I support you in your effort to be more brave. However, please do not put any unnecessary pressure on yourself. I think you are very brave to ask for help on 7Cups; therefore, continue to be who you are!
One of the ways I learned to appreciate my quiet nature is from reading this article: “Things You Should Know About Introverts” …
1) We need to recharge alone.
This right here is the cusp of the entire introvert v. extrovert debate (if there is one, anyway) – Introverts need to be alone to recharge. We tend to get completely worn out by socializing. This is basically what it means to be an introvert.
2) We don’t hate being around people, but we probably hate crowds.
I love being with people, but if you drop me into a large crowd I instantly feel like I’m alone and invisible. I try to avoid situations where I feel that way, so I may decline your open invitation to some random event. It doesn’t mean I don’t like to be around you, it just means I like to have more control over my surroundings.
3) We don’t mind silence.
I can sit beside you in silence and not think we are having a bad time. This is especially true on road trips and can be a little confounding to true extroverts. For this reason, I especially like going to the movies where it is already considered rude to chat. Rule #1 for dealing with introverts – Don’t tell me I’m “too quiet.” I hate that. Sorry I’m making you uncomfortable, but you really don’t get to decide how much I have to talk.
4) Just because we are introverted doesn’t mean we are shy.
Introvert and shy are actually two different things. Google it! In my case, I’m a shy introvert (the double whammy!).
5) We can turn on an extroverted personality when necessary, but it is especially draining.
See #1 and #2. I have no problem getting up in front of a group of people and giving a talk. I don’t even get nervous by a question and answer period. But – here is the thing – I will need major recharge time afterwards and I won’t be able to keep up this extroverted illusion all day. I can turn it on to dazzle a crowd, but if you take me out for lunch afterwards, I’ll probably just listen to you talk. I am an excellent listener.
6) We aren’t judging you.
See #3. Did I get quiet? Do I have a mean look on my face? I’m not judging you; I’m just wrapped up in my thoughts with my ***-resting-face on. I might have even forgotten you were there. Sorry, just poke me. I didn’t do it on purpose.
7) We secretly love it when you cancel plans.
I like being with you, but finding out I suddenly don’t need to be “on” and it wasn’t actually me that backed out? – priceless! Don’t worry if you have to cancel, I’m probably thrilled to be able to stay in my pajamas.
8) We can get very wrapped up in our own thoughts.
My inner monologue is epic. When you have a strong monologue constantly running in the background, it is pretty easy to settle-in and listen for a while. I have to work through things in my head before I proceed, so I usually need a few minutes. When I’m ready to move forward though, I am 100% on top of it!
9) We can be pretty bad at connecting.
You know when you have had a really bad day and you just want to call up a friend and chat? Yeah, I’m bad at that. I tend to wait for extroverts to reach out and include me, so when the time comes that I need support, I can be a bit lost.
10) We don’t like to hang around.
That time after an event or meeting ends and stragglers hang around to talk – yeah, I know this is the perfect time to make more plans, connect with new people, and get involved with future projects, but I really really really hate this. I’m probably already checking my phone in my car before you have even picked up your purse. Small talk with strangers is my kryptonite.
11) We have strong opinions.
Just because I have difficultly sharing them sometimes doesn’t mean I don’t have opinions. Give me an extra minute to compose my thoughts and I will continue to push myself to speak up sooner. It is a give and take here.
I know you will grow up to be someone positive and brave.
As for my life, I am happy I survived the week with the number of appointments I had. Having the whole Friday to do nothing. I am a little sad that I won’t be helping my daughter move back to her dormitory this weekend, but not too sad because I will need all the rest I can get ☺️
I am definitely an introvert from the list but i feel more proud with myself and accepting of what i am i can speak up my mind more clearly to those who are precious to me and even if they don't always understand me i m just happy i could get the courage to speak up about how i truly feel this experience had been so healing to me i feel like i m finding myself again thank you again i m so glad you are doing well i m praying for your recovery i believe your daughter will understand if you can't make it what s important is that you get better she is quite lucky to have such a supportive father i wish you get a good rest and a smooth recovery see you
@wisteria28
It’s wonderful that you are finding yourself again! I’m glad your experience on 7Cups has been helpful.
What are your plans for your break? And when do you go back to school?
Thank you unfortunately my break will be short this time I will be back on September but i m grateful enough i got some time to rest i didn't make any plans as for now i ve been practicing driving lately with my father and spending more time on my hobbies reading and crocheting .It's been some time since i heard from you have you been doing well ? I hope you are feeling good
@wisteria28
Thanks for asking. I was very tired in the last 2 weeks. First, I had some appointments to attend in preparation for radiation treatments. Then all last week, I was in the hospital every day for the treatments. I finished my last one yesterday—I was totally exhausted. Plus, I spent some time with my children on Sunday.
I am just getting back to 7cups today, and I have missed it!
I understand that your break is short … I’m glad you are able to get some rest. Are you excited to drive? How did you get started with crochet? I always wanted to work with fabric/yarn, but I don’t think I have the patience for it. What was the first thing you made?
What books do you like to read? When I stopped reading for school, I picked up a lot of memoirs, but now I am trying some serial killer detective mysteries.
Have fun with your driving lessons! And I hope you are finding much relaxation with your hobbies. I love how I can escape into a book!
I hope I can write sooner next time!
I can't imagine how hard it must be to go through all that i wish you a safe recovery i m glad you had the time to spend with your children i really admire your positivity it's inspiring.
I am excited to drive though not a very good driver i feel like i m making progress besides it's a good way to spend time with my dad since he works a lot we don't sit down often so i enjoy practicing with him even if he is quick to get angry sometimes, can't blame him though with how bad my driving is hehe .
I started crochet a year ago i wanted to try something to relax my stress and though it was hard at first and i was really close to giving up i m glad i did not i m currently working on some fingerless gloves i m still working on them so i don't know how they will turn out the first thing i made ever was a key chain in form of a bow i also made a small pouch It looked cute i use to put some of my accessories sometimes.
I was always fond of reading especially classics "little women ","jane austin's books","a little princess".. i also like to read self improvement books like atomic habits,ikigai,5 am club...though i m not a native english speaker i love reading english books i also read french books: tolstoi war and peace(he is russian but i read the french version of his books) ,albert camus,victor hugo.. i don't speak french as well as english but i can understand it well enough johanna spyri's book heidi was the first long book i read in my life my father was the one who got me into reading and i m grateful he did what about you? what books do you like ?detective mystery books are interesting my mother is into them agatha cristie is her favorite author i will be trying it out .
Don't feel pressured to write sooner take your time your messages always make me in a good mood and i m always happy to hear about you and about how you are doing wishing you the best in life take care .
@wisteria28
Your father is incredibly lucky to have a daughter like you!
And I’m very happy that you didn’t give up the crochet. It seems to have brought you some comfort and the ability to make very cool items! I love the descriptions of your keychain and pouch. (You inspire me—I think I will try to play a little piano before the summer is over.)
I enjoyed Little Women very much, and Les Miserable is one of my favorite novels!
Ah ha … I can also see what a blessing your father is—to be able to pass on a love of reading, it's one of the most precious gifts a person can give. I didn’t learn to appreciate books until I was training to become a teacher. After I got into the profession, my love for reading changed, and I switched to writing.
It wasn’t until I met my partner, Laura, that I became interested in books again. She loves memoirs, so I got into them. And now I am exploring some crime thrillers.
I am always happy to hear from you, too!
Are classes starting next week?
I can assure you I am the lucky one to have such an understanding father .And i am sure your family is just as lucky to have you.
You definitely should play the piano again it is always fun to pick up hobbies to pass time i always wished i could play the piano it is one of my favourite instruments it is so relaxing and beautiful.
I think i also had a time where i didn't read as often but i soon got back to it to be honest when i was a child it was my way of seeking attention from my father since he worked a lot i liked reading to impress him and it worked somehow i got to spend time with him and got the love for reading through it.
It is nice to have a partner that shares your interests and hobbies .
Classes won't be starting yet until the 22th of September so i have time to prepare.
I hope you are doing well i am always happy to hear about you sending you my wishes for good health and happiness.
@wisteria28
“I can assure you I am the lucky one to have such an understanding father” <<---- This is the reason why is I think your father is so lucky! (Laura says the same thing about her dad; unfortunately, I don't think he was capable of appreciating how she felt about him when he was alive.)
Getting attention from your dad by impressing him with your reading is very sweet and well-balanced. Whenever I heard stories about children trying to impress parents, it was always in a negative context where the attention that the child received was not as “valuable" compared to the pride that the parents received. Do you know what I mean?
In your case, you received attention from your father and a love of reading. Maybe this experience stands out to me because parents in American culture can be extremely selfish (just like our president).
Anyway ...
I’m so glad you still have a little time before school starts again!
Enjoy it 🌞
💛Sending you my wishes for good health and happiness💛
Thank you i wish you the best too
@wisteria28
Hey guess what?
I read Heidi for the first time, and it is such a precious story ☺️ I wish I could have read it to my children!
As the grandfather felt about having his granddaughter with him, reading Heidi must have brought upon me the reflection of an “inner sunshine of heart”. Thanks for sharing the first long book you read on your own 🌈
It's no problem i m glad you loved it my father always used to tell me that once you read a good book and reach the end you wish it would not end that was the first time i experienced that feeling and i carried it with me my whole life i would slow down on purpose hoping i would never reach the ending books really are wonderful they have the power of conveying others feelings,thoughts and events from a time so different than ours It's fascinating and heartwarming i m glad you felt that😊
@wisteria28
I did feel that feeling!
There was a time in my 20s when I read some books over and over.
I still do sometimes.
Thank you again!!
You are welcome It's my pleasure
Hi @wisteria28 !!
How is school? I hope you aren’t too stressed … but if you are, remember 7cups is here for you (and I am too, even though I haven’t been around for a couple of weeks)!
I finished my 2nd round of chemotherapy infusions, and the side effects are the same as the first round: indigestion and gassiness for the first several days along with extreme fatigue throughout the cycle; however, this time, the fatigue is more intense and I need to monitor my blood pressure. Overall I am doing very well though, very content with life.
I am thinking of you and hoping you are having a good weekend!
Hello it's been quite a while I didn't use 7cups in a while because of how busy I was I m preparing for my exams and next week i will be going to the hospital to start shadowing a doctor for the first time it is a requirement for new medical students and i am kind of scared the amounts of lessons is overwhelming and i m worried i won't get to be in a good speciality or i won't do well but i am doing well overall i m content and happy i chose this path and i want to take accountability for it .
I am so sorry you are going through this don't give up i m cheering you on you will get better i just know it you are one of the strongest people i know i hope you have a safe recovery your gratitude always insipire me in my life and makes me want to give everything my all you are an amazing person
So am, i keep thinking of you and whether you are doing well i hope all your days are blesed and well i am always reassured when i hear from you and see that you are well .
Very special greetings to you @wisteria28 😊
I am so glad you are busy and moving forward in your life. You are an amazing person and so strong as well! I was lost, clueless, and weak when I was in my 20s. I spent over a decade trying to find “my path”, and when I found it—I realized I had been on The Path the entire time!
Whatever overwhelming feelings you face (or challenges that come your way) … you will get through them, especially with friends and family to support you. But if it is difficult to feel support from the people close to you, the Universe (or God) is always there to help us. Miraculously, all of our hardships will be transformed to goodness. Just wait and see 😎
I am so grateful and inspired by my team of doctors that I feel extremely lucky. I will be starting a new type of treatment this weekend. It is called T-Cell Engagement Therapy. I forget if I shared this newsletter with you: it is something that my therapist helped me and Laura to create for friends and family. It keeps you updated on my progress. If you and I ever lose contact, you will be able to have information through this link: https://bit.ly/4mh5Yd0 (the google form here and from the newsletter is another way you can reach me).
You and 2 other friends I have met on 7Cups have been so important for my healing, I cannot thank you enough. With everything you are doing in your life—you give me hope and inspiration 🌈
If I am not in contact with you on 7Cups, I will definitely be in touch via the newsletter.
I hope your exams were okay and that you are enjoying your placement at the hospital 🤍🤍🤍
Hello @FaithfulScout
It's been so long since I used 7cups as I was pretty busy with university and my studies it makes me so happy to know you are doing well your messages always inspire me more and more and your positivity and happiness is contagious.
I think you are the amazing person here your messages and those from this communityhelped me overcome a very difficult time of my life i hope i can do the same for you somehow and i m glad i can be of help even just a little.
I hope this treatment helps you recover well ,i ll definitely contact you through the newsletter if we ever lost contact here i m so happy you have good people family and a wife who support and stand with you they seem like amazing people .
I do believe in miracles maybe me finding this app has been a miracle in itself a gift from god .I wish you a safe recovery as always and hope you are safe and well .
@wisteria28
You are far more than a “little help” 😊😊😊
I do not take our connection for granted. I absolutely believe in miracles, especially the ones that happen every day. For example, I believe each new day can bring new possibilities. I find this to be particularly true when I encounter failures and hardships. Through a lot of spiritual work and my relationship with God, I have learned that life always offers plenty of second chances and there is no such thing as being “a failure” even when we fail sometimes.
Anyway, I believe you are a gift (especially to me) ... you bring such positivity and good for the world, it is truly inspiring!
I hope you are enjoying your studies, @wisteria28!
Thank you so much, your words makes me so happy I have never been called a gift by anyone it really made my day â¤ï¸
This meeting has indeed been a gift to me as well i m glad i met you and everyone in this community you guys saved me I m glad to be of the same help to you i hope i am.
I hope you ve been doing well lately and that your health is good.
I was offline for a while because of the pressure of studying and the never-ending exams( they are still going onð¥²).
Wish you the best and sending you my love and wishes for a safe recovery and happiness and health .
@wisteria28
Thank you for the love and wishes 💛🤍💛🤍 ... and I circle them 🤍💛🤍💛 ... back to you in abundance because you deserve it!!!
I’m always happy to hear from you—Good luck with the studying and your exams!
Thank you I wish you the best of luck too 🫶🏻so am I it makes me glad to know you are doing well
@wisteria28
I am so glad my pictures and videos made it to you!!
The way you talk about snow helps me to appreciate it more ☺️
If we get snow this year, I will be thinking of you, instead of what a bother it can be—Many thanks, my friend 🤍🤍🤍
Please do so think of me next time you see snow 🤍