Advice for partners or supporters
I know this is a hard question to answer but what do you do to support someone who isn't taking enough responsibility for their own growth?
Backstory: been with my partner 3 years and known him my whole life. He has childhood trauma. He has some borderline personality traits, and he may have DID (undiagnosed). He switches and disassociates when under stress, sometimes waking up later not knowing where he is or how he got there and being aggressive and distant while in that state. I've tried so hard to help him but he is not really taking responsbilty. He acts out and then carries on like nothing has happened. He doesn't address his behsvior. I used to be able to get through to him, to talk to him, but lately he is dumping his trauma and pain on me, and massively projecting and blame shifting. He's not someone who will actively seek therapy. I love him, obviously, and I don't want to abandon him but his behaviours are really having a massive impact on my own wellbeing. How can I help him? What's the best thing to do? When would I know if I should step away?
From personal experience, as an individual that has Audhd/PTSD and DID. I feel that the term "acting out" does not apply here, because when an individual with DID switches it can be hard to regulate the emotions of the body/host. I can not give advice, however what I can do is recommend perhaps journaling could help get the alters emotions out, however as host it is his job to find a common ground with his alters and work through things together. You deserve to be respected, and cared for as you are doing for him. I am sorry that you are going through this <3
