Sharing how I feel

Hey so thought I would share what I go though idk if I actually have ocd or not because well I've always hated therapy recently I've tried too get in a finally figure out all what's going on/what's wrong but now that I really need the help I'm stuck on a 6th month waiting list to even see a professional.

I'm pretty sure I might be tho I've seen my father struggle with it and I do a lot of the same things and the people around me just don't understand they think that I flip out over tiny things but too me it feels like there's a itch I can't scratch and I'm so angry and upset until I can fix it I have specific things that I need done a certain way but also sometimes its completely random like needing something too face a certain direction or haveing to have it center with the room my big thing tho is things facing front and looking even also haveing too do some things 3 times and on top of that I just have these racing thoughts that never go away like I'm hyper fixated on what I call my projects aka building computers and cars or just anything I can get my hands on well that's all the thoughts are thinking millions of steps ahead even if I don't even have said project to work on my brain is just putting together the layout 3d models what exactly I would need too do and it's really draining and when I wanna focus on something else or do basic tasks it makes it so hard especially conversations or remembering things because I'm moving so fast and have no room to think I just can even keep up like it has its bonus ig Im really good at fixing things but it's like everything else other than that is like preforming a impossible task