Struggling (tw: SI, SH, Substance Abuse)
I got out of a facility almost two months ago for mental and substance disorders. I haven’t really felt like using but I have been engaging in self harm and having some strong suicidal thoughts. Im no longer living life and im back to just trying to find ways to keep going. I feel like im running out of options as the only people in my life that “care” just don’t *** care at all. I don’t feel loved or cared about and if no one cares about me why should I give a *** about myself. I guess im just unlovable. Good things last around an 1/8th of the time the others I just feel like I’m dead. I’m tired of it all.
@JoshJE
Hi, that makes sense what you're saying: the priority at this point is trying to stay alive in whatever way possible (which maybe that sometimes involves self-harm). And it's really difficult to keep going and struggling without a clear resolution in sight if nobody around you seem to be on your side or caring about you feeling better.
By people who "care" (but end up not caring), do you mean family/friends? Maybe the facility that you got out of a couple months ago? (I noticed that you said that you haven't felt like using, but it sounds like things are still really difficult, so I wonder if maybe they weren't as helpful as you might have hoped for.)
FYI, if you ever feel like things are crossing a point where there's a serious risk of something bad happening, just passing along the following link with some crisis hotline/textline resources:
https://www.7cups.com/crisis/
