Worried about being liked in therapy
I have seen the same therapist for many years and still, everytime her tone is off or she doesn’t smile or she greets me differently, I get this thought that she hates me and I should end therapy.
@Jacs5
In reality, this does happen. Some therapists aren’t always professional and may show emotions toward their clients. It’s also possible that they’re experiencing burnout—especially if you’ve been seeing the same therapist for many years. Perhaps you could discuss this with her? Or maybe you should consider finding a different therapist?
@Jacs5
Hi there--I like the idea of bringing it up with her (including any anxiety/worry you have about it). If you've been seeing for years, it feels like it would be a waste to throw away a long-term relationship without trying to talk through it.
There could be a lot of different things happening and it's a bit ambiguous.
1) It could be unrelated to you and she just occasionally has bad days where her own mood is off and she's responding differently because of it (e.g. tired, difficult sessions with other people).
2) It could be that she does periodically have negative reactions that are related to you and they're leaking through. This still wouldn't necessarily mean that she hates you, and if she's good at her job she should be able to talk through it with you and make the most out of an uncomfortable situation.
3) It could also be that she's not aware of any change from her end and doesn't feel or think any differently, in which case she also doesn't hate you.
