Too Short TW: SA
Theater week was my favorite week at my private school
Id help paint sets and make silly bets with my friends
We'd cover ourselves in paint and slide across the glossy art room floors
I loved my black shorts, rhinestones on the pockets
Even with my tiny acrylic stains
when Wyatt came to the art department, It sounded fun
he was my friend of course
earlier that year we had a talk about purity
they showed us a piece of paper
and violently crumpled it up
they said "look at this paper and try to fix it make it straight, see you cant, would you use this paper??"
we shook our heads no
"now imagine that's a flower would you pick that flower?"
we shook out heads no
"this paper, this flower covered in creases its never the same is it?"
"this is what happens when you dont treasure your purity" they told us
I remembered that talk the day wyatt had touched my private parts
we sat in the theater on show day
its was so dark no one could see the hand prints he left on my legs
i felt somehow so lonely in an entire auditorium
I tried to get help but they told me
"it was your shorts, you know that you're overdeveloped for your age, you wanted this"
my pastor told me "you are now that flower, you are now that paper. no man will want to pick you, not even god will for your sin"
those petals that fell that day from my skin, that paper that ripped my soul is something I still guilt trip myself into thinking it was all me, I am that paper, I am that flower, I am impure...
@Innovarefy
I’m sorry no one supported you, you’re definitely not a crumpled paper, you’re a human being and will always have worth and value. And the actions of someone else shouldn’t reflect on you.
Someone did something horrible, that’s not your crime or a reflection on your character. It should be the person who did the horrible thing that bears the guilt for what they did to someone else.
I’m sorry when you should have had kind words and support you got blamed and criticised instead. That doesn’t have to be the rhetoric you accept, but I understand when that’s all you hear it’s hard to think otherwise.
I hope you’re doing well, and if you do see yourself as a flower, remember that they grow back, with the right care and support you’ll be strong again.
Take care and best of luck with everything.
I do not like the Catholic Church
@Tripleplay
me either lmao
I am sorry you had to experience something like that. There is a special place prepared for people like that.
The heinousness of Wyatt's offense aside, the only question I had was "did you go to some kind of religious school"...that was answered above, I see.
Also, physical "purity" is overrated. Just because someone is not a virgin doesn't mean she is somehow a lesser human being. Your worth depends on your character & actions, not on whether you have a maidenhead or not.
@Innovarefy
Very sorry to hear that happened to you. Nothing can excuse a guy acting like that. For everyone else who offered no support and has nothing good to say... They could arguably be almost as bad in some ways.
I'm glad that you're here and away from their limited points of view. As such, maybe you should tell that pastor that flowers live a short and idle life. We're definitely not here to be "picked" by someone or have someone write all over our entire being as if it were paper. We have potential, and you're in good company... I've had girls SA me back when I was religious and wanting to take things slower. Feeling damaged doesn't define you as damaged goods.
Seeing you share this only makes me think more highly of you. It's because I'm able to see more of who you really sre. Scars don't define you, you do, and it makes you a lot stronger and more beautiful than some people's mindsets can understand.
@Innovarefy
I want you to understand this wasn't your fault and never will be I went through something like this when I was a baby I have no photographic memories of this but my body knows it happens and I am aware it did as well but I'm always here if you need me and anytime you think "its my fault" its not and it never will be
Sexual assault is NEVER the victim's fault and no religion can convince me otherwise.
