tw/ the loop

tw/ drugs and alcohol abuse

somedays were really tough

i couldnt bear the yelling

i went out to clubs a lot

and drank and smoked and snorted

my life was rough

but im not telling

on all the people whod done me wrong

im just saying that sometimes

the only distraction you can find is a bong

a tab or bottle

a cig or a vape

a substance a drink

just an escape

but it never helps

not for long anyway

the high never lasts

and you have to face

the messed up world

that we live in

but you dont want to

so you chase

the same effect

except it wont be the same

youll have to take more

use heavier things

just so it can affect

your broken self

the same way it did

the first time

soon the drugs will be kings

and youll be simply a servant

a vessel

a body

just an observer

of your own future and actions

youll hope to quit

and hate being like this with a passion

but its not that easy and simple

its not rational

you want to stop being a junkie

yet you buy your meth

smoke your weed

and snort your coke

hide your high from the people you care about

not to dissapoint them

youll try to get out

of this wretched loop

but youll fail and some might condemn

themselves to this life

theyll stop trying

theyll lose their fight

theyll keep lying

to keep themselves high

some will keep going though

through withdrawal and all the urges

come out damaged

tired

beaten down

but sober

and some

will be proud

of their achievements

some will be loud

about their improvements

yet if they do pass

this awful test

they wont be fragile like glass

but they might be a mess

theyll try their best

even if its mediocre to others

just know theyve done more than the rest

to be mothers

fathers

brothers

sisters

and lovers

friends

and not junkies.