Eldest Daughter

I am the eldest daughter,

I cannot have flaws,

I am everyone's emotional support,

I comfort my mom after her and her boyfriend fight,

I smile when I want to cry.

I have protected people's emotions before I even understood my own,

When I break no one notices,

They can’t notice,

because I am the strong one.

I am the second parent to my siblings,

Even when I am struggling,

I never got to feel like a real kid,

found out Santa didn’t exist before I turned 9.

I cannot cry because tears are messy,

and I have to be strong and tidy.

I notice everything even if I don’t act like I do,

I know when my parents are stressed about money,

I notice when to shut up,

I feel guilty when I want something,

because I feel greedy.

My family calls me strong,

They stop asking how I feel,

I feel invisible,

like I can’t show my own emotions,

because people need me.