How to Get Unstuck From the Stories That Trap You

“Our bodies and nervous systems are sending us signals all the time, often outside of our awareness, and we create narratives to interpret and make sense of these signals. Understanding the role of our nervous system in trying to protect us when we perceive “threats” (especially when they are not real physical threats) can help us to reshape our stories to be more accurate and helpful.

The next time you are feeling anxious, angry, down, or stuck, try these four steps:

1. Be curious about the story you are telling yourself. Is it fact? (Hint, usually not).
2. Reinterpret the signals you are experiencing in your body by understanding that this is just a reflexive response of your nervous system trying to protect you. Thank it for trying to help you. What changes when you do that? (For one, this can help take the intensity out of what you are experiencing and remove blame, shame, or self-criticism).
3. Reappraise your environment to see if you can find cues of safety present. Help your nervous system understand this is not a true threat. One way you might do this is by connecting with something that you care about in the context you're in. When we can activate our neural circuits of care, we turn on a different part of the brain that can help to dial down our thread response.
4. Choose one small action step that moves you in the direction of well-being.

Example

Situation 1: You are at a social gathering and feeling ignored.

Your story: I’m not an interesting person. No one likes me. I may as well leave.

Using the four steps: My nervous system is feeling threatened because no one is talking to me, and everyone’s head is turned away from me. It’s very possible people are just caught up in their own conversations and aren’t noticing me here. I came here because I care about having interesting conversations and meeting new people. I can strike up one conversation and see how it goes.”

Read the whole article at PsychologyToday

#Anxiety #Well-being #Narratives

💬 Do you think this technique could help you deal with uncomfortable situations?