Psychology Today: How to Overcome Self-Consciousness
“According to those who study self-consciousness, it's human nature to focus on ourselves sometimes and to focus on others at other times. We might reflect on our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors or the thoughts, emotions, and behaviors of others. The extent to which we focus or self-reflect on ourselves is thought to indicate our level of self-consciousness.”
When we feel self-conscious, we might experience a variety of self-conscious emotions. They are:
Shame
Pride
“We tend to experience self-conscious emotions when we feel we have lived up to—or failed to live up to—some expectation or ideal we have for ourselves. Although self-conscious emotions are not always fun to experience, they help motivate our behavior in important ways. They can drive us to achieve more, to behave in ways that help us win friends, and to engage in more kind behaviors. Overall, they help us achieve important social goals.”
“When we're self-conscious, we constantly question ourselves—our thoughts, emotions, and actions. We need to learn to trust ourselves—only we know who we are deep down, and it's up to us to decide how we want to live our lives. But that requires self-trust.”
“Are you working a job that's not the right fit for you? Do you hang out with friends who you don't really like? Are you living a life that doesn’t feel authentically yours? It can be hard to trust yourself if you're making decisions that aren't in your own best interest.”
“Next, act on your beliefs and values. The more you follow your own path and do what feels right to you, the less it matters what others think. When you know something is right for you, then it is right for you.”
“In some ways, mindfulness might just be the opposite of self-consciousness. It involves staying present in the moment (vs getting stuck in your head) and accepting situations and emotions as they are (vs worrying about them or trying to control them).”
Read the full article here.
#MentalHealth #Anxiety #Mindfulness
My take:
Self-consciousness has been a battle for me for probably most of my life. And it’s been interesting, because, as I’ve gotten older, how others may or may not perceive me has mattered less. However, my battle with self-consciousness has usually been in my own head, with my own critic. And, while that battle has gotten better over the past few years, it’s not over for me for a long shot. I can definitely second what this article said about acting upon our beliefs and values. It is a very comforting feeling for me when I know that I’m acting authentically as well as on the right path.
And as a question for you all:
When you’ve felt self-conscious in your lives, how have you dealt with it?
@sereneSunset26
Amazing topic to discuss/ read more of, thanks for sharing, Sunset and I appreciate you for sharing your experience too. ❤
It can be hard overcoming these feelings of self consciousness specially if it's too overpowering in our lives and interactions with the world, but it does help to take one step at a time in working on it and being in tune with how we perceive and feel about ourselves, at the end of the day, that truly is what matters the most. 😊
@Sunisshiningandsoareyou
Thank you so much!!
And you're absolutely right; how we feel about and perceive ourselves is really what matters the most. :)
@sereneSunset26
From reading this post, I learned that the extent to which we focus or self-reflect on ourselves could indicate our level of self-consciousness. I have struggled with self-consciousness and I can see that when I start to focus on myself more, I also snowball things that I am not satisfied with. To deal with this, I always try to do what feels right for me and I always try my best. Then, even if it does not work the way I want, it does not affect my self-consciousness dramatically. I know humans cannot be good at everything and sometimes we also need learning opportunities for self-growth.
@globalBraid3744
"I learned that the extent to which we focus or self-reflect on ourselves could indicate our level of self-consciousness. I have struggled with self-consciousness and I can see that when I start to focus on myself more, I also snowball things that I am not satisfied with. To deal with this, I always try to do what feels right for me and I always try my best. Then, even if it does not work the way I want, it does not affect my self-consciousness dramatically. I know humans cannot be good at everything and sometimes we also need learning opportunities for self-growth."
I bolded the two parts that really stood out to me from what you said. I'm also guilty of letting things (or just thoughts) snowball into well...a bigger snowball, lol. There's many times I have to remind myself, especially with my body, that my best can and will change, and that I am legit always trying to do my best.
Also had a psychology professor tell me (the class) once that if we're not looking for opportunities to grow, then we're stagnating. And that piece of advice has definitely stayed with me.
@sereneSunset26 I've always felt self-conscious throughout my life. Much more so when I was younger. It's become a bit better now but it still lingers. No matter how hard I try to shake it off fully, it returns during certain situations. I don't think I'll ever not be self-conscious so I try to deal with it in a healthier way.
@comfortableNight4463
I can totally relate to 100% of what you said.
As I have aged, dealing with self-consciousness has gotten easier. While at the same time, accepting the things that may always be a part of my character has also gotten easier. But at the end of the day, there will probably always be that frustration factor for me, at least somewhat, for things in my life that I'd like to change but are ultimately out of my control.
@sereneSunset26
This is great read and definitely being self-conscious is a problem that many people go through including me. I think for me I get self-conscious when I compare myself to other people. Getting rid of that mentality and finding satisfaction in my situation and who I am is something I've been working on.
@sunnyWriting4806
You know, I completely get that.
Even without being in the digital age or bombarded by social media, I think it has always been in the fabric of the human condition to want to compare ourselves with others. Especially those that we might perceive to be better than us for whatever reason.
But yeah, I have found comparing myself to others to be just about the quickest path towards losing my sense of peace of mind. There are many things that I wish I could change about my life, as well as what my body deals with. But at the end of the day, they're out of my control, and I have to recognize that, like most people, I'm doing the best I can everyday. :)