ScienceDaily: Feeling lonely? What we want from our relationships can change with age
“In every relationship, we expect certain basics. We all want people in our lives who we can ask for help. Friends we can call on when we need them. Someone to talk to. People who "get" us. Someone we can trust. Companions with whom we can share fun experiences. But the team's theory, called the Social Relationship Expectations Framework, suggests that older people may have certain relationship expectations that have gone overlooked.
Akhter-Khan's first clue that the causes of loneliness might be more complex than meets the eye came during a year she spent studying aging in Myanmar from 2018 to 2019. At first, she assumed people generally wouldn't feel lonely -- after all, "people are so connected and live in a very close-knit society. People have big families; they're often around each other. Why would people feel lonely?"
But her research suggested otherwise. "It actually turns out to be different," she said. People can still feel lonely, even if they don't spend much time alone. What efforts to reduce loneliness have neglected, she said, is how our relationship expectations change as we get older. What we want from social connections in, say, our 30s isn't what we want in our 70s."
Some Insights From This Article
Loneliness spans across all ages and cultures, no matter what stage of life we are in, everyone can feel lonely in some shape or way. However it’s important to note that what we look for in relationships and social interaction can change from person to person. Some people can have many friends and connections surrounding them but feel lonely and isolated, other people may have very limited connections but feel immensely fulfilled within their social life.
Oftentimes we think that the “loneliness” we experience now is something that we’ll be dealing with throughout our lives, but this article suggests otherwise. As we grow in terms of age and personality our expectations for relationships do as well! So don’t lose hope that you’ll be stuck in this cycle for the rest of your life :)
What does a good fulfilling social life look like for you?
Full article is here!
#Loneliness #Age #Relationships
@sunnyWriting4806
I think many of us are lonelier then ever ......... "friends" on social media are not real friends for many and the likes and smiley emojis are short lived.
Some of the best feelings a person can have will not happen on an app....... i was in a shoe store ran into a girl i worked with years earlier she had married a boy that worked there as well ...... we exchanged pleasantries .. she told me i made an impression ........and showed not only her but spouse too how to laugh at the obvious or absurd........ certain situations they just look and say "bet tiger would have something funny to say about this"........many of others we worked with she did not even remember their name.........
I doubt many will say to someone "remember when you wrote a post" ....... real interaction happens but not as often............ even in families when others have their eyes and minds looking at a phone or computer........ many people are lonely even surrounded but those disconnected from the reality of the moment.
@toughTiger6481
I agree with your statement about the actual loneliness that can be hidden with technology and the rise of social media as the overtaking force of social interaction these days. There's a sense of fabrication and disconnection whenever you interact with people online versus when you're in person face to face. This can have implications as you think you're "building" a relationship online but in reality you're just really perpetuating your own loneliness.
@sunnyWriting4806 I don't even know because I've honestly have never had one lol, most of the people I'm friends or acquaintances with have busy lives or are in relationships ..then again 30's is a boring age where you don't go out much haha
@tealLion9329
haha I definitely understand. Maybe perhaps that may be the norm as we all grow up! Hope you’re able to catch up with some here and there!
@sunnyWriting4806
Wow what a wonderful article, thanks for sharing !
It's comes to my mind that the quality of interaction play important part in the feeling of being a part of it as well.
It play a part that if we genuinely feel connected in the interaction.
@democraticCoconut192
i definitely agree. Sometimes people will get all the interaction in the world but if it isn’t a quality interaction it may feel meaningless and ultimately we may feel more alone even when we “talk” to so many people.
@sunnyWriting4806
What an insightful article!
I think for me a socially fulfilling life is one where I have a few close people in my life I know I can count on... where I can rely on them and they can rely on me. I think if one knows they have such people in their life they know they are never "alone" if they are physically apart or isolated
@sahal97
you are right. Sometimes one dear close friend can make us feel less lonely than having 1000 surface level friendships!