Thrive Global: How to Ask for — and Actually Get — the Help You Need
“It’s a common workplace experience to be wary of asking for help, even when we know we need to. Admitting we need support can stir up all sorts of uncomfortable feelings. According to executive and leadership coach M. Nora Bouchard, we might feel incompetent, like we’re losing control over our work, or we may even have a fear of others rejecting our request for help. But asking for support doesn’t need to feel so daunting.
Here are a few ways you can learn to feel more comfortable asking for the support you need:
1. Focus on the positives
Focusing on potential negative outcomes of asking for help pushes us toward avoidance or procrastination, which ultimately just worsens our stress and anxiety. Instead of worrying about negative outcomes, shift your perspective to think about the positives. For example, you might feel relieved once you ask for help, or find an opportunity to build a more collaborative relationship with your colleagues. You’ll set a precedent for finding support moving forward, and you’ll probably deliver a better final outcome. The next time you notice negative thought patterns popping up about asking for help, make a conscious effort to redirect your attention to the potential benefits.
2. Make your request specific
When asking for help, being specific is essential. Try not to over-explain the issue to your colleague. Instead, briefly outline the context for your request. Stick to what you need to accomplish, why it’s important, and how your co-worker can help. It may help to do some homework beforehand to gain a better understanding of where you’re stuck, identify the specific pain points that are blocking your progress, and see where you need others to step in.
3. Be collaborative
When you do ask for help, frame it as, “We can work on this together.” This can make clear to others that you’re not trying to shirk your responsibilities, you simply need some support. Collaboration can also activate your co-workers’ intrinsic motivation and make them more engaged and interested in the task at hand. Even just saying the word “together” can have a positive impact.
4. Express your gratitude
Saying thank you, even in advance, can make people more likely to provide help. A study of email signatures found that emails that closed with an expression of gratitude boosted response rates by 36%. So the next time you ask someone for help, try this Microstep: After completing a project, and before you move on to the next task, write an email thanking a colleague (or your team) for their support. The simple act of putting your gratitude in writing will strengthen your relationships with co-workers and allow you to reflect on how much their support helped.”
Read the full article here!
Reflection: Do feel uncomfortable asking someone at work for support? If so, do you apply these micro steps mentioned in the article, or would you like to add some other micro steps?
#AskingForSupport #Workplace #Microsteps #Relationships
@professionalVision2624
Great tips, Vision. Thank you for sharing this wonderful article. ❤
It can be hard to ask for help indeed, not limited to just workspaces ofcourse. The tips are helpful in making one focus on the positives, practicing gratitude and being specific about the request.
For workspace, I believe something that might help would be a reminder to self that both you and the person you want to reach out to, are working towards common goals and purpose in the organization and therefore, what might affect one, could also affect another and the organization in in-direct ways also. Now keeping the common set of beliefs and purpose in mind, it would make sense that the other person would be more than willing to help out as they can, for common good also.
Building supportive peer relationships is highly important, I feel. Looking out for each other and supporting when required are great ways to form the same.
@Sunisshiningandsoareyou
I agree totally! It’s important to build supportive peer relationships and to look out for eachother when it comes to that is also important!. I also believe that it’s important to constantly remind ourselves that the person you need help from, has also been in that situation you are in, especially if you are new on the job. This can help us to not feel alone or bad when we do reach out for help. Thank you so much for your comment!
@professionalVision2624
Being thankful is something that we always forget to do after and makes people less likely to help again, not with just a "thanks for doing this" but actually going out of your way to make that person feel appreciated for what they did. This can mean offering something else to help them with or in other more subtle ways like buying them morning coffee or offering to buy lunch for them after a particularly hard work session, etc.
@sunnyWriting4806
I agree! They do say that “actions speak louder than words” this is especially true when it’s about showing appreciation and being thankful. Since going out of your way to make the person feel appreciated says more than simply saying “thank you”. Amazing insight and thanks so much for sharing!
@professionalVision2624 Thank you for the tips! They're quite helpful
@zealousGrace5023
I’m so happy you found the tips helpful!
@professionalVision2624 ^_^
