Chapter 5 - Her name was Burnout

"Hi Scratchy how was your day? You spent the day chasing your own fluffy tail and frolicking in the garden? That sounds nice.

"Mine wasn't as lighthearted. I thought I was going to have a tense meeting that turned out straightforward and short."

"I thought doing something else was simpler but that turned out to be really hectic. I feel like this fluey thing is trying to wear me down and beat me."

"I like knowing I've done today's tasks but I felt so tired and empty. I got it all done and my body and brain was screaming for a break."

"I realised for once I put my needs above others and not only said Please help with this, but also No I'm not doing anymore today."

"That was huge for me. I just feel obligated to do what I perceive is the right thing and constantly focusing on something important instead of slacking off."

"And to be honest, taking care of myself is too self indulgent for me. I can neglect my needs particularly if there is a lot to do."

Scratchy shook her head sadly. "This is why you're sometimes prickly and unapproachable. You push yourself too hard and snap."

I nodded unable to argue. "My cough does seem worse. I had hoped to slow down, it is the weekend soon but I've more stuff to do tomorrow and for the next couple of months."

Scratchy beckoned me closer. "I think it's time you open the window. Let's hangout properly."

I grimaced. "I'm sorry Scratchy. I'm not ready for that yet, it's too soon and I don't trust you fully. I worry about ulterior motives and letting my guard down."

Scratchy gave me a strange look. "Are you sure?"

I didn't like this confrontational side of her. It was too much. "I have to get going, thanks for your company."

I briefly waved farewell and hurried away. I cannot let her in. I just can't.