Babies

I've been married for a year now and after much thought and considering everything I decided I want to have a baby, I was ready! Mentally and emotionally.. But right after we've tried, a huge wave of anxiety and overthinking covered my mind. I'm thinking about anything and everything, the baby's health, mine, our lives, my freedom.... every single positive and negative possiblities! My mind is about to blow sometimes and I don't know how to stop! I started with searching online about every question I had regarding the pregnancy, but now I'm at the point where I'm thinking about my man, do I even want him? Lol it's crazy considering we have no problems and we love each other and both are very committed. But I'm thinking about it you know? I sometimes even think about my toxic ex, fantasizing about getting back to him blah blah, even though it's impossible and wouldn't do that even if I'm not married! The point is, I'm panicking and I hate myself for thinking about all the shitty things I think about, I want to relax and remember that was my decision and it was rational, but I can't! What to do!?? Why this is happening? I'm I not ready?