Broken up with, possibly cheated on
I was with a girl for almost five years. It was the first time I’ve actually been in love with someone. We spent almost every day together, and we talked about eventually getting married. She broke up with me in December. I didn’t know exactly why at the time, but after seeing some of her social media posts, I’ve found out she left me for another guy. Looking back on how she acted towards the end of the relationship, I’m pretty sure that she cheated on me with him. I hoped to find out from her and get some closure, but she said she was dealing with some new problems and didn’t have time to talk about “old issues.” So, I don’t think I’ll never know the whole truth. And that kills me. But what kills me more is knowing how miserable I am, but knowing how happy she is now that she has someone new. I pretty much revolved my life around her. And now that I’ve lost her, my life just feels empty. I don’t know what to do with myself. And despite all that, she’s doing just fine without me. We don’t even talk anymore. I feel lonelier now than I’ve ever felt in my life.
Im so sorry, i know uncertainty and loneliness are very difficult to deal with. Im in a situation where I dont even know if my marriage has any hope and im lonelier than ever. Its so hard but this is the time for you to love yourself more than ever. Even the simplest things that make you happy will be the things that will keep you going. Thats what im trying to tell myself as im reading your story because as hopeless as I feel, I believe its true. Try to see if there are any hobbies you can explore. This would be the perfect time to invest in bettering yourself. Yes some days are harder than others but you can get through it!
Yeah, self-love is definitely something I need to work on. I’ve never had a high opinion of myself, but now is probably a good time to start. And I’m so sorry to hear about your marriage! Whatever happens, I hope both you and your partner come out of it happier and healthier.
Now you have time to get to know yourself! This is growth my friend.
This girl is not courageous and she is immature. She doesn't want to face the consequences of what she's done. Believe me, the guilt is probably not making her feel as happy as you think she is. I just had the same thing done to me. It drives me crazy to think that I'm suffering and he's in a new relationship. However, only 5% of relationships born out of cheating end up being for life. Chances are that this girl will sabotage that relationship because she didn't process her break up. In the long run, you'll be stronger and more likely to engage in a healthy relationship. She'll remain immature and confused.
Thing is, we (seemingly) ended it on good terms. We talked about how we still wanted to be friends and we were both really cool about it. It wasn’t until I found out the real reason she left me that I started feeling like this. I want to give her the chance to own up to what she did because I want to believe she’s a good person, but at this point I can’t keep hoping for that. And I’m so sorry the same thing happened to you. It’s hell. It really is. But I know we’ll both move past it. Just gotta take it one day at a time.