Divorcing is hard.

Obviously it isn’t a good time. My almost ex and I actually have a good friendly relationship but romantically it wasn’t working. We have a 4 year old who lives with me. I just feel so lonely all the time and consider not divorcing him just so I won’t be alone. I sometimes snap at my daughter because she’s being impossible but she’s also so little that of course she’s going to push boundaries and initiate power struggles. I feel like I am the worst person in the world some days for little to no reason, I know that covid is making this worse but I just don’t see this feeling ending. I don’t want to have to start over after after 13 years, I don’t know if I’ve ever really dated. But I know this needs to happen, he tried to cheat and has a lot of unresolved childhood trauma that he just refuses to get help on so he turns to substances. Nothing too terrible but I just don’t want him around our daughter with how negative and disturbing he talks sometimes. Any tips on how to not just feel so defeated and overwhelmed while single-parenting?