Fiance broke up with me while I was in the hospital
Hello all,
So my fiance(30F) of one year (relationship started in 2016, we got engaged May 2019) left me(33M) while I was in the hospital this past March. I was in the hospital back in September 2019 as well for the same thing (double pneumonia due to vaping and smoking). I ended up diagnosed with double pneumonia again in March, but I was afraid it was COVID19, so I went to the ER and they admitted me due to my condition of nonstop coughing and not being able to breathe. While in the hospital, my health deteriorated - I was put on a ventilator because I could not breathe on my own, this last about 10 days, with the doctors not sure if i'd be able to use my lungs again. I also went into cardiac arrest for 15 minutes when they took me off the vent to see if I could breathe on my own. Things were not looking good. My ex fiance and I were on good terms before I went in the hospital, even early on as my situation was not as bad - we spoke daily from what I can remember while in the hospital stays for 2/3 days. Then I went onto the vent and things changed from there. I woke up 10 days later as my situation improved. I battled back and was going to be discharged on 4/7/20, I received a call from her on my hospital phone from her as I didn't have a charger for my cell. She said verbatim "This is like living in hell. I can't do this anymore, I'm done." That was the last time I spoke to her. I tried reaching out to her once I got home that day, then again messaged her on Easter sunday. Last time I contacted her was on her birthday 5/2, to which I sent her flowers. I again reached out on our anniversary 5/4 with more flowers with the note that I was letting her go.
Where did I go wrong here? I just felt the need to vent - sorry if it was rambling.
@morewinemorewine
Hi, Im so sorry you just went through such a very big health scare that resulted in a breakup. Life be like that, when we need more help, we tend to get treated worse. That scared her and she pictured the end and just couldnt handle it. Ive had health problems that resulted in my x making other plans behind my back, which resulted in my loosing everything: family, belongings, confidence ecttttttttttt.
I was told we came into this world alone, and will leave it alone. We must have thick skin and take care of ourselves. I hope you bounce right back in good health with a hotter gal 👍😊
@juliak1968
:) thank you Julia, I appreciate to know that I am not the only one to have dealt with this(sorry you had to deal with this as well). It was just so blindsiding, as we were setting up preparations for the wedding, picked out a venue, put down money for entertainment and everything. I can't really fathom how you can spend time with somoene for 4 years and when you get sick they just run away. Baffling to me how people can be selfish. Of course I'm not innocent in all of this, she wanted me to stop smoking and drinking - but aside from that I treated her really well. I haven't even asked her for the ring back, she can keep it. Material things like that can be replaced, I definitely cannot be. I'm not saying I'm perfect, but I tried my best.
I've just now started to seek therapy to just get my self back and have been working out and going to NA meetings for my bad habits. Mostly all for me, because I can't do anything for others anymore, time to love myself for once.
Thank you for your reply :D
@morewinemorewine
Thats really the best thing, self care, getting to know and appreciate who we are.👍😊 its for the best you discovered she was a flight risk if things ever got bad early.
Rely on #1😊
