Getting divorced

I came home to quite a surprise 3 days ago. My husband was extremely angry. I ask what is wrong, and he says that if I have to ask her is not telling me. I then figure out, that he he had gone through my drawers and found out that i had been comforteating the day before. Jeg then starts to call me a lot og nasty things. We have had problems for a while because of my anxiety, me losing weight and him getting a female Friend, that he wrote All the time and spend all his free time with. I told him it made med uncomfortable and i would like to spend time with him too and needed more support in my path to losing weight. Jeg then said i was controlling and jealous.

I stupidly checked his phone, and could see he had to this female friend that i was toxic and my anxiety was too much and he wanted to leave me and that she was his first priority. I told him what i had seen. We decided to try and Work on the. But three days ago he just verbally attacked me, calling me a backstabbing lying bitch. And that he couldn't believe that i was losing weight when i have had a slip Up. He also said that i was sleeping around when he was not home and that i was generally a bad person.

I hve No idea where it all came from. I've been out of Work because of my anxiety, so i've been home a lot. I've been feeling overwhelmed and like i was drowning, so i haven't been very happy or have had the energy to clean a Lot. In the give years er have been together i have often asked him, if he could help me with the chores so that i could have energy to Work on my self and still have a job. But he have never been interested in helping. And everytime i've asked for help or support in getting Better he always said it was my job to do it alone.

So i now sit with a feeling like i'm a bad person, who have never done enough and just generally a bad wife who let my anxiety fill to much in my life. And i do admit that anxiety have been a big part of me the last two years, and that i hated myself.

I Don't know what to do now. I Don't want him back, but i feel so lost and alone. And i feel bad that he is sitting in a house he can't pay for alone.

How do i move on?