Grieving

My partner moved out after three years together.

We are polyamorous and she began seeing someone new a couple months ago. While this is normal and expected she began lying and breaking our agreed upon boundaries over and over. I feel like I didn't react in a manner that was productive and kind, but I felt so raw and betrayed so I lashed out. We tried to renegotiate boundaries along the way, but it felt like I kept conceding and she continued to pull away.

While I know that this is for the best since we had become toxic together, I cannot shake the soul-crushing grief and longing that I feel for her. She was supposed to be part of my forever. She was family.

We discussed trying to find space away from each other to do some personal growth and to try and find each other later down the road. I don't actually trust that she's going to do this, but I want it now than anything.

/End rant