I feel utterly lost in my marriage
My husband of almost 4 years told me he’s been thinking about separating about two weeks ago. He says he’s not sure about it and I feel so lost in who I’m supposed to be or what I’m supposed to do. It’s like I’m waiting for an answer from him when I know I’m worth so much more. He barely speaks or sees me everyday so talking about it just isn’t going to work this time. I’m torn between waiting for him to approach me or making the decision to leave for myself.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. You’ve got to ask yourself some questions before you make any decisions. How did you feel about the relationship before he mentioned a possible separation? Why are you not speaking or seeing each other? Why won’t talking work? He needs to give you a deadline of when he will decide on a separation. I told my husband we can work on things for 4 months and then I will let him know if I want to separate for the summer for 2 months. There have to be deadlines and a time frame, otherwise you will be stuck in limbo. We are all human beings “free to act and not be acted upon”, so it’s always an option to approach him—it’s up to him how he responds—or decide to leave yourself. Whatever you decide, decide with confidence and not fear. Good luck!