I found out my husband my have feelings for someone else?!
My husband had a conversation (while drunk) with a friend of his girlfriend and said she is the one in a perfect world!!! I have been a complete mess and don't have a clue what to do!!!
A little bit of a back story- we have been together since we were 15 & 17 it has been 22yrs and married 15yrs this yr. He has never had a close female friend that wasn't one of his buddies girl. We have had a rough couple of years and we were in counseling things got great but yep this is the now.
I took my rings off and told him he needs to do counseling and see if this is what he wants.
So my question is what do i do????? I love this man with everything i have and am now thinking this is a fraud..
@blueTurtle4879
Hello,
You and your husband have been together for many years and this can be difficult even in the most amazing relationship. It is normal to worry about the kind of relationship you have and if your partner is loyal to you. There are a few things that you may need to consider when making a decision about your relationship. As listeners, we are not able to tell you what to do but we can shed light on some things that's you may not have thought of or noticed. We can share insight which can help you to decide what is best for you.
The first is that he made this comment while he was drunk. Although they say that alcohol can act as a truth serum, it does not mean that every statement said or written is fact. It may be a good idea to speak with your husband about what he meant and why he felt the need to say this.
You also mentioned that your relationship has had its ups and downs through the years. Is there a commitment to making things work on both sides? If so, this incident can also be discussed in counselling. Is your husband willing to take this step in fixing the issues in your relationship? You seem concerned that he seems to befriend the females that his friend is dating. How do you think this affects his friendship with his male friend? It is possible that a conversation between the two men needs to be had and boundaries agreed apron. Do you and your husband have conversations about what is acceptable in your relationship and what is not? This can also be discussed in counselling.
I think the main messege here is communicating what you want effectively with your husband. Deciding for yourself what you want in the relationship. If the conversation that you have about boundaries, counselling, and commitment does not come into play, it may be difficult for you to remain committed to the relationship. It is important that you have the kind of relationship that you desire and deserve. Your partner should also have the same goals in a relationship and these should be worked on together.
I hope this helps and best of luck!
