In Second Week of Separation
My husband of 8 years, coupled up for 12 years total, decided it was a good idea to sext with his work friend. I was suspicious ever since this friend popped up. First it was "just a friend" then it was "best friend" then the "sister he never had" and then when I checked his phone it's all "babes" and your beautifuls and amazing and just makes me want to gag. He has also been suffering from depression and has been on a pretty decent dose of antidepressants for the past few months.
Long story short I found the proof at the beginning of this month and I have already moved out and we are trying to co-parent. I have been in my new place a little over a week and it is killing me. I can't stop texting him. I can't stop re reading all my proof, I just can't turn my brain off.
The thing is I have this very real hope he will get the mental help he needs and be the man I knew this whole and in six months we can rebuild. I know it is a longshot but it's all the hope I have right now. The good things are they never did anything physical and the lovey dovey/sexting had only been for about two weeks. I also have a solid job and money in the bank but I want to rewind the clock so badly and have my happy family again.
How do I stop talking to him unless it is about our daughter and logistics. Because all I want to do is yell at all the time.
@practicalSpruce8644
It is so hard and I'm sorry you're going through this. I've been separated from my husband for about a month now (due to emotional abuse and communications breakdown). I found it helped to reach out to friends and family, talk with them about my fears, and keep everything with my husband very unemotional and simple. Have you guys tried counseling? Counseling actually made things worse for us, but one thing I learned was that we probably needed to go into the counseling with a goal. For us, that would be improving our communication to avoid hurting each other. For you guys, maybe something like rebuilding trust and connection? IDK.
@peacefulforest75 thankfully he seems open to counseling even if it's just for co-parenting. Even if we never get back to where we were I don't want to be at my daughter's wedding hating him. I think he is confused and very unhappy so I keep encouraging him to find his own therapist and support group.