Is he really just done with me, that easy?!
He broke up with me on Sunday. The week before I caught him talking to another girl on fb and asked if he could take her out for drinks. I have trust issues (from my past as well as knowing he cheated in his past) so I always secretly would look through his phone and fb. And of course I did find him talking to that girl. I was crushed but love him of course so I tried to work past it till he broke up with me the next week. He said he's been feeling like he's just not in love with me for the last 2 weeks of our relationship, that he doesn't feel like himself with me, the relationship is to stressful, that we fought to much, my anxiety/depression is to much for him to handle, I have to many trust issues, and that we both have to much on our plate that's stressing us out and wearing on the relationship. From the start he was perfect, everything I was looking for. Hard worker, good career, great father. In April I had a miscarriage, he knew of the pregnancy from the start and had moments of being excited but overall didn't want a 3rd kid. Since then the miscarriage has caused me some depression and it weighed down on us and we began fighting. I felt his unhappiness with me which again made me more depressed cause I loved him, I wanted nothing more than for us to make it out of the storm and be happy again. Now I'm left empty, alone and heart broken, missing him and his boys who I made my world for the past 10+ months. We had so much in common, wanted the same things, had similar goals with life and careers. The only thing is I know I want my own baby sometime (the pregnancy we had was an accident) and he's not sure if he ever wants another kid. He would tell me I'm the best thing that ever happened to and promised he didn't ever want to put me through what him and his ex had. (it was toxic, everyone told me nothing but horrible things with him and his ex's relationship). When we broke up he said I don't want you to hate me or blame me or even blame yourself. He said that I treated him good but we both just have to much stress going on. Since we broke up he's changed his picture and status on fb, and has been adding other girls asking them to hang out. Idk what to do, I gave everything I could with loving him and his boys and I feel like I've lost my world. How can he just move on and be done with me like that if I treated him so good? I mean of course he fell out of love so that's the answer right? But how does someone just give up a good thing or give up on love. Especially when you say your to old to be bouncing around relationships and don't want any games or bs. I never played any games, he knew I loved him like crazy. But how can he just be OK and move on while I'm falling apart every day. :'(
You ask yourself how does someone give up on a good thing or give up on love and that's the missing piece to this situation, which is love. As you mentioned on your post, he has lost feelings for you and that's why this is all so easy for him. I have been in your situation before wondering the same thing and I have also been in his shoes before with moving on quickly. The fact that he's talking to other girls and putting a lot of effort to find new girls is making this easier for him, I am sure he's talking to multiple girls and by doing this it's making things easier for him to move on from you. You can't put your life on pause though and wait for him to come back or home that he comes back. Seeing the way things ended between you two should make this easier to get over him. You shouldn't ever want to be with someone. You deserve someone better, someone who will put in the same effort as you do and who appreciates what he has with you and realizes it and doesn't give up. Plus you don't want to be with someone where your constantly checking there phone or facebook wondering if they are doing something wrong, that's a bad sign right there. I use to do the same thing as you and those girls I worried about were the ones who were actually cheating on me. Relationships are built on trust and knowing that you don't have to worry about what the other person is doing is a great feeling. I know breakups are tough, especially for you watching someone get over you like it's nothing but at the same time you have to see this in other perspectives. You should realize that he's not worth it if he moves on you like you were nothing, obviously his feelings for you was a lie. I've been in your situation and yeah it's tough but there is someone out there for everyone and someone who is better for you. Like I said earlier you deserve better and you seem like an amazing girl and I know you will find true love. Just hang in there, move on from him, and it will all be worth it. If you need help or someone to talk too, I am here for you.
