Loss of attraction

26F and 27M married 7 years this year. Together since 2012. The past few months on and off I’ve had the overwhelming feeling of wanting to separate. There will be weeks that pass where life is perfect then weeks I just want to get in the car and drive away. I feel like I’ve lost myself. We are with each other 24/7 (farming for a living). I have no friends to vent to. We have 2 kids under 7. I don’t want them to hate me. I am horrible at communication. The last time I brought up my feelings was about a year ago and it got really ugly. No physical harm but verbal and threats of suicide were thrown at me. I’m afraid to leave or bring up the idea if he is really serious about harming himself. I just wonder if a few months apart will help me sort my feelings. For space to miss each other. I fell like time apart to reflect will strengthen my relationship with him. I don’t know how to bring up the topic. I had thought about writing a letter then leaving for the weekend to go to a hotel or something but that’s the longest I could get away unless he agreed to leave the house to stay with his parents.